tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-57432225054071220422023-12-03T01:41:12.997-08:00Semi-Deep Thoughts by Neighbor JuliaJuliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.comBlogger41125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-45331601066801889062018-09-07T22:22:00.000-07:002018-09-07T22:22:01.373-07:00Book Review: Saints Volume 1<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/36882231-saints" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px"><img border="0" alt="Saints: The Standard of Truth (Saints, #1)" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1529853228m/36882231.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/36882231-saints">Saints: The Standard of Truth</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/18150957.Church_of_Jesus_Christ_of_Latter_Day_Saints">Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints</a><br/>
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2522320792">4 of 5 stars</a><br /><br />
I enjoyed volume one of the church's new history narrative, Saints, that came out this week. I had already read the first 7 chapters in beta and was excited to read the rest. It was very readable and I think it will help inform members about church history. This book really puts things in a easy-to-read format. Since it's written in chronological order it really helps give perspective to the people and events of the restoration. While it does attempt to tackle some of the more troublesome parts of church history it still wasn't quite as comprehensive as I thought it was going to be. <br /><br />However, I do think Saints is a good beginning resource and is free on the gospel library app under church history. You can also use the church history tab to access articles about people, places and events that are mentioned in the book. I really hope people will use these well researched and insightful writings to enrich their understanding, sacrament meeting talks and lessons. I also hope it will be a good jumping off point for people to expand into other more detailed books on a variety of subjects that this history addresses.<br /><br />First some things I liked:<br /><br />I love how the authors took people's journals, letters and remembrances and used them to create a really novel-like retelling of church history. I'm happy that this account included a lot more detail about women, people of color, and other minorities who helped build the kingdom. I loved reading quotes from these groups and hearing their perspective about what was happening at the time. It also included the perspectives of many people who opposed the church and showed that they weren't just one-dimensional villains. Many times the greatest antagonists of the church were actually disaffected members. This narrative does a better job of showing how complex and multi-sided this history really is.<br /><br />I was so relieved to see a much fairer version of Emma portrayed in this book than has been communicated in past histories (due in large part to Brigham Young's dislike of Emma). I liked that the writing was less formal, using just her first name when referring to her. This history helps put us in her shoes and head and see what a hard, and at times impossible, road she endured.<br /><br />I loved that they included so much from Phebe Woodruff too. She is one of my favorite founding saints and thanks to her and her husband's journal keeping we get such a clear picture of who they were. Another recent book I read that drew from her story was "A House Full of Females" by Laurel Thatcher Ulrich. Also a great read!<br /><br />We got to know all of the members of the Smith family better and got a few new insights into Joseph Smith's upbringing and the timeline of his revelations. I think this helps us understand Joseph's ideas about heaven and family a little better also. The book also included some intro discussion about the many different first vision accounts and also his teachings on Heavenly Mother.<br /><br />In regard to Joseph, I think this book did a good job of using some of the stories everyone knows and mixing in some less talked about facts like that Joseph drank throughout his lifetime, he used seer stones, that the endowment borrows heavily from masonic rituals, that he and many of the saints believed the end of the world was imminent, and that he practiced secret polygamy. While it was great to see these each mentioned and discussed it still didn't really get too deep into any of them. For a more in depth look at the life of Joseph Smith I really loved Rough Stone Rolling by Richard Bushman.<br /><br />Now for some things I was a little disappointed with:<br /><br />I was sad to see that while they did discuss polygamy a little more in-depth than usual, they still didn't show the whole picture. In fact there were several parts that really confused the issue if you weren't already familiar with the history. While I know it isn't feasible to include every one of Joseph Smith's plural marriages in this type of book I do think they could have at least shown a better variety of who he married. While it mentioned that some of his marriages were problematic (such as marrying wives of other members in good standing) they don't elaborate on any of these. Instead they focus in on some of the more palatable relationships. I would have really liked them to tackle some of the more problematic stories like Marinda Hyde (Orson Hyde's wife) and Zina Huntington Jacobs (whose husband was on a mission) at the time. Or Helen Mar Kimball who was only 14. I would also have appreciated some discussion about some of the wording used in Joseph's proposals to some of the women including promises of exaltation if they married him and threats of damnation for their whole family if they didn't go through with it. I was glad to see they discussed Fanny Alger partially.<br /><br />The book also discusses Emma's dislike of the principle and the relief society's efforts to stop plural marriage. The book seemed to imply that it was John Bennett's infidelities that made Emma hyper vigilant about stopping rumors and making sure women weren't being taken advantage of. While that was certainly a factor, the rumors she was primarily concerned with stopping were those claiming Joseph was practicing plural marriage. "Rumors" which coincidentally were true. It also never mentioned that her presidency and much of the relief society at the time were plural wives of Joseph Smith. Emma sends Sarah Cleveland, Eliza Snow, Elizabeth Durfee and others to stop the rumors but since they are all married to Joseph behind Emma's back the issue is that much stickier. However, I do believe the book did do a good job depicting Hyrum Smith's response to plural marriage, as well as Oliver Cowdery and Emma's dissapproval. For a more in-depth look at Joseph Smith and plural marriage I would suggest "In Sacred Loneliness" by Todd Compton. It's a fantastic look at each of the women who married Joseph Smith.<br /><br />I was also hoping for a little clearer picture of the first Relief Society Meetings beyond just the plural marriage scandals. Although it does mention that Joseph organized the relief society to be patterned after priesthood and that he turned the key to the women it didn't talk at all about female blessing meetings. Women gave and were encourage to give healing blessings to one another and did so regularly during the first meetings of their organization. The history did talk about how women administered ordinances in the temple but not about the washing and anointing ordinance that was done outside of the temple before child birth. Of course that might still get a mention in volume 2 as they cross the plains and make it to Utah.<br /><br />Overall, it was a very good picture of the first era of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day saints. I hope that people will read it and research each part further as well. Like I said before, this is really just an introduction. I am very grateful to the large number of historians, writers and editors who worked on this history. I am so excited that the church is putting a spotlight on church history and helping us to begin our journeys to being more well informed saints. I'm excited to see what happens in volume 2!
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-12601612975771893852018-07-31T12:29:00.005-07:002018-07-31T12:29:43.875-07:00Book Review- The Council of Fifty: What the Records Reveal About Mormon History<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35886287-the-council-of-fifty" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px"><img border="0" alt="The Council of Fifty: What the Records Reveal about Mormon History" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1501521666m/35886287.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35886287-the-council-of-fifty">The Council of Fifty: What the Records Reveal about Mormon History</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/2297990.Matthew_J_Grow">Matthew J. Grow</a><br/>
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2447890633">4 of 5 stars</a><br /><br />
I picked this up the last time I was at BYU. I hadn't previously read the council of fifty minutes but this was a good over view to what they contained and what some of the themes seemed to be throughout the minutes. And consequently, I read over some of the minutes as I read my way through this book. The minutes were not made available to the public until 2016 when they were published by the Joseph Smith Papers. Each chapter of this book is an independent essay by different religious or historical scholars that take us through the minutes somewhat chronologically and by topic. While I find some of these authors and/or topics more interesting than others I generally enjoyed each chapter and their unique insights.<br /><br />The council of fifty was organized not long before Joseph Smith was killed, held meetings during the years in Nauvoo following Joseph's murder, and met occasionally in Utah under Brigham Young and John Taylor. It was comprised of around 50 men (it fluctuates a bit), 3 of whom were not members of the church. The minutes give some great insights into not only the final days of Joseph Smith but also to the years that always seemed to be glossed over in Mormon history between the martyrdom and the arrival of Brigham Young and company in the Salt Lake Valley. <br /><br />This book begins by giving a little background into the reasons behind the creation of the council of the fifty. Joseph Smith took things very literally at times. He and most of the Saints believed that the second coming was imminent. Joseph believed that in order to bring forth the second coming the kingdom of God needed to be established on earth. While most Mormons now view the kingdom as an eternal institution Joseph and associates thought of it as a physical world government. The saints at the time also felt very let down by their country's government. Some contributing reasons for the creation of this secret group were the protection of the saints and their leaders, writing a new constitution, and campaigning for Joseph Smith's presidential run. <br /><br />Under Joseph Smith's leadership the council meetings seem to focus around their thoughts about national and local governments, the meaning of the "Kingdom of God", the relationship between church and state, the relationship between the church and the kingdom of god, the injustices they felt they had endured as United States citizens, and Joseph Smith's run for the United States Presidency. Many of these sessions are pretty philosophical in nature with not much concrete work getting done in terms of actually writing a constitution or moving Joseph Smith's campaign ahead. Patrick Mason writes an excellent essay on the term "Theodemocracy". As explained by Joseph Smith that is a government where power is held by God and by the people. Instead of the famous saying "The voice of the people is the voice of God" (thank you west wing!), theodemocracy is based on the idea that "The voice of God shall be the voice of the people" (as asserted by Brigham Young). How much power should be given to "Theos" and how much power to be given to "demos" is a topic of debate amongst the members of the council. With Joseph leaning toward demos and Brigham leaning toward theos.<br /><br />Using this concept of a theodemocracy the council attempts to write a new constitution for the world. The saints at this time had been heavily persecuted and had also participated in violence themselves. They felt that local government and the federal government had failed to protect them or assert any form of justice in their behalf. Saints at this point had been beaten, raped, killed, stolen from, and driven out of several states. The council realizes that the U.S. constitution has some pretty large holes in it when it comes to minority rights and so they set out to form a constitution that is more inclusive to minorities (with their emphasis being on religious minorities). After Joseph Smith's murder the council's sense of injustice is increased even more and the discussion turns to ideas of justice, revenge, and even punishment for those who contributed to the martyrdom. I found this discussion interesting because the church today has so entwined patriotism with religious ceremony. I think it would be interesting for many members to learn about the true feelings many of the founding members of the LDS church had toward the United States and it's leaders. There are many statements from the minutes quoted in this book about how fallen the country is, ways in which the US constitution fails and needs revising, and more. <br /><br />One of the authors even talks about a time when the Salt Lake Tribune was writing an article about the pioneers and asked him to supply 3 interesting things that the average church member wouldn't know about the pioneers. One of his facts was that they were pretty dissatisfied with the government and were actually seeking to leave the country when they came to Utah. He wrote that before these minutes were published and said that while he received a lot of hate mail at the time from people who declared that their ancestors loved this country and it's constitution, he has since been vindicated by the evidence as found in these minutes. <br /><br />This leads us into the next topic that is discussed- moving the saints. Dissatisfied with their treatment under U.S. law they begin to look outside of the country to places like Utah, Alta California, Texas and Mexico. It is discussed somewhat under Joseph Smith and then detailed and decided upon under the guidance of Brigham Young. While California and the coast seemed to be most favored at first and favored by Joseph Smith, Utah is finally decided on. Having been driven out of several places already by "old settlers" they want to find a place where they can be the first settlers. They also want a place that isn't too desirable so that others wont fight them for it. Salt lake seems to meet both these requirements, cuts about 600 miles off of their trip to the coast, and it's also on the trail to California and Oregon so they can get some traffic coming through for trade.<br /><br />Another theme discussed is that of Mormon and Native American relationships. The early saints believed Native Americans to be Lamanites and they saw it as their responsibility to convert these Lamanites back to the truth of their fathers. They also believed that once the Lamanites were converted and joined up with the Mormons they would help them take back the land and overthrow the government that had oppressed both the Mormons and the Native Americans. There are several campaigns and missionaries sent out from Nauvoo to accomplish this goal. They are for the most part unsuccessful but this idea is another reason pushing them to migrate west and live among the different tribes of Native Americans.<br /><br />The minutes also cover development and construction both in Nauvoo (completion of the temple and Nauvoo house) and in Salt Lake as they begin to establish their vision of Zion. We see the minutes really change from discussing the philosophies and big pictures of the church to discussing the very tangible and day to day needs of the church. <br /><br />This document also just gives us a window into some of what happened during that time. We see many brethren leave the church. We get a glimpse into some of the chaos that occurred after Joseph is martyred. We see that there were many people who claimed that Joseph had told them what should happen next and where the saints should go and that it wasn't just peacefully decided that Brigham Young would be the next leader. I was aware of some of the conflicts that arose between the high council and the quorum of the 12 apostles but this also highlighted that many of the members of the fifty thought that the governing power should lie with them.<br /><br />For me the overall take away was how much some of these men persevered even when the things they thought were going to happen didn't. They thought the second coming was imminent, they thought Joseph Smith would be vindicated, they thought the U.S. would protect them, they thought there would be widespread conversions among the Native American's, they thought the council of the fifty was destined to become the new and greatest government the world had ever seen, they thought the Nauvoo house would be finished and that it would be a place where the dignitaries of the world would come to stay, and even when none of these things came true in the ways they'd hoped they still stayed dedicated to their prophet and religion and to moving the saints out of persecution. The minutes give us a glimpse into the fact that these were men with differing opinions, backgrounds, and ideas. It also shows us the nature of church councils and leadership. We often think that all the early church decisions were made in meetings where God just came down and told the saints exactly what to do. While they did claim to be inspired by God they also made choices by counseling and studying and doing what they thought was best. Sometimes they got things right and sometimes they didn't- much like today. The minutes and this book provide an interesting look at the evolution of thought amongst the Latter Day Saint movement.
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-83241400803582159962018-04-01T21:07:00.000-07:002018-04-03T10:19:32.804-07:00Easter Thoughts <br />
I've spent a lot of time thinking, talking and writing about different aspects of my worldview including my religion, political leanings, and books that have inspired me. Often my posts may sound overly analytical or even critical against policies and injustices I may find within the cultures and communities I'm a part of. Speaking specifically of the LDS church culture, it's no surprise to anyone that I have strong feelings and opinions that sometimes seem to go against the mainstream.<br />
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Today, however, rather than focusing on the things I have questions about, I want to focus on the things that I believe. I'd like to talk about my testimony of my Savior, Jesus Christ, and how a belief and hope in Him has shaped the way that I interact with others and the way I view the world. I'm not trying to speak on behalf of anyone else or convert anyone to my way of thinking. I just want to express my own personal beliefs about who Jesus Christ is and what He has done for me. Whether you believe in Christ or not, whether you belong to an organized religion or not, whether you consider yourself spiritual or not, I hope that this post can at least be an interesting study into what one person believes is true and give you a better understanding of who I am as a person.<br />
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First a quick background into my religious upbringing. My mother was born into an LDS family but didn't attend church from her early teens through her early 30's. My father wasn't raised in any religion and while he is a spiritual person is somewhat skeptical of organized religion in general. My mom began attending church again around the time I was born and my siblings and I attended the LDS church with her growing up. My dad briefly joined the church when I was 8 (we were baptized by the same missionary) and left the church around the time I turned 11. We were sealed as a family (Mormon's believe that families can be together for eternity when sealed by those in authority) when I was 10 years old. My dad hasn't really attended any church since that time although he's well versed in scripture and spiritual matters. My mom has served faithfully in many callings in the church (we don't have paid leaders at the local levels of the church- so when we're asked to do things it's called a calling). She was one of my primary presidents, young women's presidents and stake young women's president while I was growing up and has served as a seminary teacher and Gospel Doctrine teacher for the last 10 years or so. She's pretty knowledgeable when it comes to the gospel and has the unfortunate task of fielding most of my questions and concerns and complaints about the church.<br />
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And so I find myself incredibly dedicated to a religion that I also occasionally disagree with or feel hurt by. On my bad days all I can see are the policies that I want to change (the role of women, our treatment of the LGBTQ community, our tendency to romanticize our history as perfect, etc). However, on good days I'm filled with the an enormous gratitude for the teachings that I've received from being a member of the church. 1) That Jesus Christ is my Savior, 2)That I have Heavenly Parents who love their children, 3) That we are commanded to love others as much as we love ourselves and 4) Our Heavenly Parents have given us the gift of the Holy Ghost, our agency and direct lines of personal revelation to help us achieve our goals in this life and lead us to a new life to come. I'm trying to live my life in a way that reflect these beliefs and I want others know that to me, following these beliefs is what it means to be a Latter Day Saint.<br />
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Mormons get a bad rap sometimes because we do a lot of things that seem very different from other religions. If you're not a member of the church the "weird" stuff might even be all you know about Mormons. These include the facts that we study from the Book of Mormon in addition to the Bible, we wear different underwear, we don't drink alcohol, we attend a temple, we perform baptisms for the dead, many youth go on a two year mission, etc. Because these things get talked about so often (in and outside of the church) we can sometimes lose sight of the most important aspect of the religion, which is our faith in Jesus Christ.<br />
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I remember the first time someone told me I wasn't a Christian. It was in a Jr. high P.E. class. The girl sitting next to me during warm ups leaned over and told me that she'd noticed I had been talking with a girl in our class who was Mormon and that I should be careful because Mormon's weren't Christian. I asked her how she knew I was Christian and she told me that she'd heard me talk about Christ before. I replied that I was a Mormon too and since she knew I was Christian she could believe that the other Mormon girl was christian too. She left the conversation sad, saying that I wasn't a Christian after all and that at her summer bible camp one of the classes she went to was about how terrible Mormons were and how to avoid them. I remember telling her a couple more times that I believed in Christ and so I was a Christian, but she let me know that I wasn't because I didn't accept him into my heart the same way that she did. My two main thoughts from that conversation were: 1) how did she know how I accepted him in my heart? and 2) Would Christ teach a class on how to avoid other people? Didn't he spend his life talking with and serving the tax collectors, the poor, the sick, prostitutes, and unbelievers?<br />
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I attended a pretty religiously charged high school. I had the opportunity to discuss religion with many of my friends and even some of my teachers. While I've learned so much from my friends of other faiths and have had many friends who respect my beliefs, high school was also spent defending my religion from some pretty negative criticisms from others. Interestingly enough several of my closest friends were jewish, agnostic and atheist. Probably because while my ideas seemed strange to the other Christians in my school, my atheist and Jewish friends thought all Christians were wrong and didn't see me as being any weirder than any of their other religious friends. In many ways my non-Christian friends were much more Christian in their treatment and respect for my opinions. I've had amazing friends with many different religious or non-religious beliefs that have deeply touched my life. I believe that truth can be found in many places and each of us will pick up the things that we need or feel inspired to carry with us. And from each interaction, friendship and relationship we will find ourselves changed. This is how it has been for me. My testimony is a living thing and I'm constantly picking up new pieces or letting go of pieces that no longer fit.<br />
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However, the central piece of my testimony is my Savior Jesus Christ. So what are the things I believe about Him? Twenty-two years after that first person told me that I didn't accept Jesus into my heart correctly, I want to try and set the record straight about how I accept Him and who I believe He is.<br />
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First some things I believe about who He is. I believe that Jesus Christ is the literal son of our Heavenly Parents. He was born to Mary and raised in this life by Mary and Joseph. This made him both divine and mortal. This is the condescension of God. I also believe that all people on the earth are spiritual sons and daughters of Heavenly Parents. This makes Christ our brother. And I think of him that way often. As my brother and friend.<br />
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I don't believe in a trinity in that I believe Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are two distinct beings. I do however believe that they are in complete unity of purpose. Christ talks many times of being one with the Father. However, He also talks about being one with the church and tells us that we can be one with the Father. This leads me to believe that when he talks about "being one" with the Father- he doesn't mean they are the same person, but that they are on the same mission. Further evidences that they are separate beings are when he prays to the Father; when he's baptized and people hear the voice of God in Heaven, see Christ in the water, and the Holy Ghost as a dove; and when Stephen is martyred and sees Father, Son and Holy Ghost as separate beings.<br />
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I believe that Jesus Christ is the only person to make it through this life perfectly- meaning without sin or mistake. This was accomplished through His inherited divinity from God and His total dedication and understanding of the Gospel and purposes of God. That purpose being to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of men and women. Central to that mission is also that they want us to have joy in this life and the next. In that vein, I believe that all the commandments that we've been given are here to help us have joy and are not just an arbitrary test to see if we'll listen. Commandments bring us joy because they help us love one another, maintain control over our own lives, and to become more like Christ. They aren't a to-do list with us getting points added or subtracted from our score every time we follow each of those commandments. God doesn't love us more when we keep the sabbath day holy and he doesn't love us less if we smoke a cigarette. However, if we keep the sabbath day holy we get the blessing of having a peaceful day of rest and enjoyment. If we never smoke a cigarette we don't have to worry about becoming addicted, paying enormous taxes, or having an increased risk of cancer.<br />
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I believe that Christ spent his mortal life teaching, helping, serving, healing and loving those around Him. Because He was perfect and had a will completely in line with the mission of our Heavenly Parents, He was able to love and have perfect charity for those around Him. He also taught us how to have a more perfect love for those around us. Having charity requires us to put away our selfish desires. Being less selfish means being less self centered. If we are loving others as much as ourselves we aren't going to lie to, harm or steal from others. Just as Christ came to redeem and not to condemn, we know that we shouldn't judge or condemn others either. Each of us may judge what we are going to do but we must also allow all others the right to decide for themselves how, where and what they will worship. This makes Christ a perfect example, a leader, a teacher, and a prophet.<br />
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At the end of his mortal ministry, Christ, empowered by his divine heritage and his perfect mortal mission, was able to perform the atonement on our behalf. I define this as a reconciliation between God and man. Through this atonement he enabled us to become one with our God again. Just as he and the Father (and Mother) are one. This atonement involved and intercessory prayer in Gethsemane, a crucifixion, and finally a resurrection. This makes him our redeemer and our savior.<br />
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In Gethsemane he prayed on behalf of the world and took upon himself our sins, our shortcomings, our mistakes, our sorrows, our pains, and our abuses. Then, while carrying them, he allowed himself to be crucified to pay the price for those sins. By paying this price he used His mercy to satisfy the laws of justice. While, as I said before, our sins don't make God love us less, they do prevent us from being one with Him. If God's purposes are for us to have joy and love those around, then every time we make choices that deviate from that purpose (i.e. when we steal, or cheat or lie or harm others) then we are not being one with our God. Christ, now aware of those sins and mistakes and intimately familiar with the fallen condition of the human family, becomes our advocate to the Father. As we repent with our hearts, in his name, we can be reconciled again to our Father. Christ understands how our intentions, our ignorance, and our confusion can lead us to part from God's plan and He makes up the difference for us. Instead of our sins resulting in a permanent separation from our Heavenly Parents or a spiritual death, we can now repent and be clean again, one with our Savior, and one with our Heavenly Parents.<br />
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But not only did Christ's atonement save us from this spiritual death, it also freed us from physical death! And that is the gate he opened when he raised himself up from the tomb three days later. Mormons are sometimes criticized for not putting enough emphasis on the cross. We don't wear them or use them in our decor or on our church buildings. However, to me, it's not that we don't believe in the cross but that we put our emphasis on the fact that the cross is now empty! That death is temporary and that Christ now lives! I love the story of him and Mary at the tomb. That a woman is the first witness of Christ's rebirth seems fitting since women (our mothers) are the first to witness our first births. He was triumphant over death and opened the way for us to be triumphant as well. I believe that there is life after this life. Not a heaven and hell that we see depicted on tv or in books, but a glorious new life where we will be free of our physical, emotional, and mental burdens that plague our life here on earth. Where we will be able to be with our loved ones and see them perfected as well. Where we will have a full realization of the good and bad we put in the world. With this new perfect knowledge of our lives, we will choose for ourselves if we feel worthy and ready to enter the presence of God. This makes Christ our savior, our redeemer and our King.<br />
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But knowing who He is is or what He has done is only half of accepting Christ into your heart. We must take hold of the gift He's given to us and use His teaching to better our lives. This doesn't mean to be perfect through our own works but to become perfect through repentance. Another criticism that I've recieved is that Mormons think we can buy our way into heaven through good works. I can honestly see how that could be a perception given that Mormons have a lot of "rules" and "practices" that seem to be different from other groups. However, I have been taught, and believe that the only way we are saved is through the grace of Jesus Christ! He gives us each this gift and asks us only to receive it. Recieving it means to repent and be one with Him. However, I do believe this Gift leaves us changed. The bible tells us that faith without works is dead. When we truly love someone it leaves us changed. When we truly love and accept the Savior it helps us change our lives. As I mentioned before- we follow His Commandments because we love Him and we realized that He gave them to us to keep us safe and happy. When we repent and accept Jesus into our lives we no longer want to cheat or harm others. We don't gossip about others or assume the worst in people. We are kind to others even when they aren't kind to us. We respect and make room for people who are different than us. We listen to different opinions and respectfully state our own. We are changed and we do better, because we know better, because our Savior has shown us the way.<br />
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In respect to us "earning" our way into heaven- I recently read an article discussing the parable of the ten virgins. It talked about that one solution to the problem of not having enough oil could have been to have larger lamps. But that wasn't the solution because none of us can change the size of our lamp. None of our lamps are large enough to carry enough oil to last through the night. We don't increase our lamp size by doing right and decrease it by doing wrong. The thing that makes us wise is realizing that our lamp is too small to last through the night. We are wise when we bring that extra oil, the Savior's oil, to make up the difference. He will fill our lamp and get us through the night. He will increase the light we emit and bring us safely to the wedding party.<br />
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Yes, reading our scriptures and saying our prayers and attending the temple can help us become better. But we're aiming beyond better, we're aiming for perfect. None of those things alone can get us where we need to be. Scriptures, prayers, and temples are all there for the sole purpose of bringing us closer to the Savior and improving our relationships with our fellow man. To paraphrase Paul- it's charity or nothing! If you have not charity you have nothing, because Charity is the pure love of Christ. Without His love for us we are nothing. Without my love for Him I would be nothing.<br />
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So, I believe I am a Christian. I study about Christ, I believe in Him, I believe Him, I pray in His name, and I try so hard to love as He loved. I fall short. I fall so short every day. I say wrong things. I do wrong things. I put myself first. I let pride and envy dictate my decisions. I speak without thinking. I talk more than I listen. I write half baked soapboxy posts. I can be ignorant, judgemental and dismissive of others. I lose my patience. I swear a little ;) and so so much more. But I know that Christ loves me. And I know He loves my family. And I know he loves the person I sit next to on the bus. He loves the people I go to church with. He love you and the people you go to church with. He loves your family. He loves people who don't believe in Him. He even loved the people who killed Him. He loves the world. He loves us all. Equally. I am amazed at the power that idea gives to me. It frees me from sin, from anger, from envy, from ignorance. It allows me to forgive things I couldn't forgive on my own. He takes that from me and gives me peace.<br />
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Being a Christian goes beyond time spent in worship, interpretation of the bible, degree or calling. It's not manifest in what we say, in our success or in the size of our audience. Being a follower of Christ is manifest in our actions and in the changing and opening of our hearts. Christ left people better than he found them. Being a follower of Christ means leaving people better than you found them. That is who Christ is to me. He takes my little wimpy lamp and he makes it shine. He finds me broken, and alone, and sick and he heals me. He gives me an eternal family. He fixes my wrong thoughts and actions. He shows me how to repent, and apologize and forgive. I'm trying to leave people better. Not by preaching at them or trying to change them or anything like that. But by simply being more loving and accepting. By listening and being more honest. I'm trying to focus more on others and less on my own pride, opinions, or insecurities. Christ helps me do that. And He helps make amends when I fall short.<br />
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This Easter I am so grateful for Christ's love for me. I'm grateful for His infinite atonement. I'm grateful for the peace having charity brings to me when I manage to have it- as fleeting as it can be! And I hope that in some small way I have shared that peace with you, not by my words, but in my deeds. These are my beliefs and they feel good to express. I'm grateful to all those who share their beliefs with me and trust me with their truths. I'm grateful for all of those people, Christian or not, religious or not, who have left me better than they found me. I know that Easter means something different to each of you. This is what it means to me. He is risen!<br />
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<br />Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-3270022033526414842018-03-13T16:06:00.002-07:002018-03-13T16:06:40.540-07:00Book Review: Women at Church- Magnifying LDS Women's Local Impact <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22817052-women-at-church" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Women at Church: Magnifying LDS Women’s Local Impact" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1406310656m/22817052.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22817052-women-at-church">Women at Church: Magnifying LDS Women’s Local Impact</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/3063770.Neylan_McBaine">Neylan McBaine</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2275259026">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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This is a great read! I wish I could give a copy to every man and woman in the church today. It's a faith based practical guide to fostering gender cooperation within the LDS church. The author is also the creator of the Mormon Women Project which highlights stories about Mormon women throughout the world. She is a practicing member of the LDS church and is supportive of our current leadership.<br />
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The author does a great job of making her position clear that while she hopes that there will be changes to gender relations (i.e. women in leadership positions, priesthood, patriarchy, etc) that she is operating within the belief that the system we have now is the system that will be in place for the near future. However, even within our current, mostly male leadership system, there are tons of things that we as a people can be doing to build Zion between men and women. <br />
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She brings in a lot of great quotes from general authorities to talk about better communication and participation in our ward councils, family councils, ym/yw programs, etc. She addresses many of the issues effecting women in the church today: not having a voice, meeting with bishops without another woman present, double standard modesty lessons, losing some of our stewardship that was given to us during the restoration, etc. <br />
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She then uses ideas and examples that other wards and groups have used to address these issues. I am grateful for the many excellent examples that were given of men and women working toward Zion. In many of her examples she uses interviews with the actual participants so that we can hear the point of view of the stake president, the relief society president, the speakers, the attendees, etc. It helps it really hit home that these examples are real, and that they can work, and that many different types of people with different personalities and callings have been able to enact great changes in the lives of many. <br />
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The ideas include many things like not always having the man speak last in sacrament meeting, honoring the YW for their Personal Progress awards in a similar manner to the YM when they receive their eagles, having wives of high councilors speak with their husbands on assignments, giving the stake women auxiliaries more opportunities to speak, including single women in our presidencies, listening to women in the ward councils, inviting the women leaders to PEC meeting, having a stake Q&A session with the women and the stake presidency so that they can know the women's concerns, having women speak at priesthood holders' meetings (we have men give their perspective on women's issues all the time...so shouldn't women give their perspective on men's issues), not using the term "The Priesthood" to mean the men (there's a difference between the priesthood and the priesthood holders), discussing in talks and lessons the many talents/skills/contributions that women have in addition to being mothers, and many many more. <br />
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Whether you have felt this pain or not, this book is a great read. If you are interested in understanding better why some women in the church today are in pain this is a great resource. If you are interested in helping women to feel more included and loved at church this is a great read. If you are interested in building a Zion people where there are no poor among us this is a great read. If you are in a leadership position and are looking for better ways to include the female community this a great read.<br />
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I believe that while Heavenly Father has given men and women different gifts he also created us with many things the same and he expects us to respect and value all people equally. He also created each person uniquely and we need to remember even within one gender there are going to be a lot of different ideas, points of view, personalities, etc. No gender is less than and as we use the talents of men and women we will be able to create more beautiful communities and lives. As we include the perspective of women and men we will see a more complete and perfect view of the gospel of Jesus Christ.
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-46400169874011643002018-02-22T16:27:00.003-08:002018-02-22T16:27:30.442-08:00Book Review: Everything We Keep<br />
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/29639736-everything-we-keep" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Everything We Keep (Everything #1)" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1459205790m/29639736.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/29639736-everything-we-keep">Everything We Keep</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/14257762.Kerry_Lonsdale">Kerry Lonsdale</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2305216877">1 of 5 stars</a><br />
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So this was the first of the my black friday dollar books that ended up making me want my dollar back ;) I guess my lucky steak of picking out random good books had to come to an end at some point.<br />
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Based on the fact that the plot sounded similar to other books I've enjoyed in the past I picked this up on the cheap during black friday. I was mostly just looking for a quick escape type book to rest from some of the heavier reading I've been doing lately and thought this might fit the bill. When I first started ready I was struck by the complete overuse of cliche's and monotonous dialogue but was a little excited by the promise of a mystery to solve (the book starts at her fiance's funeral and a mysterious woman telling the main character that her true love isn't really dead!). Overall it had all the makings of a good book but didn't follow through. It felt like the author was trying to maybe imitate Liane Moriarty or Jodi Piccoult but it really missed the mark. <br />
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Sadly, the mystery/twist was not to be. The plot and "big reveal" are pretty absurd. The writing is terrible. It didn't keep me turning the page. The first half of the book is the main character deciding if she should go on a trip or not and takes forever to get started. It was all build up and no payoff. The characters weren't likeable. And while there are two love interests in the book I wasn't really rooting for her to end up with either. About half way through she starts throwing in language and sex out of nowhere that don't really fit in with the feel of the rest of the book. I'm really pretty surprised that it has such a good rating on goodreads...and that there are two follow ups...<br />
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-45125513768195862332018-01-09T08:04:00.002-08:002018-01-09T08:04:12.886-08:00Book Review: A House Full of Females: Plural Marriage and Women's Rights in Early Mormonism, 1835-1870<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/31812528-a-house-full-of-females" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="A House Full of Females: Plural Marriage and Women's Rights in Early Mormonism, 1835-1870" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1481181389m/31812528.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/31812528-a-house-full-of-females">A House Full of Females: Plural Marriage and Women's Rights in Early Mormonism, 1835-1870</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/9639.Laurel_Thatcher_Ulrich">Laurel Thatcher Ulrich</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2249270522">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Most people know that the first Mormon settlers in Utah practiced polygamy, but what is less known is that those same saints also gave women the right to vote 50 years before the 19th amendment, had some of the best divorce laws of the time for women, and that many of those women were political activists who rallied with Susan B. Anthony and the like! <br />
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While their marriage system may seem in complete opposition of the women's rights movements they maintained that polygamy actually gave women freedom to choose who she wanted to live with, who she wanted to have children with, saved women from prostititution, and gave women a bigger support system which gave her more resources to pursue her own goals and talents. While for some women polygamy certainly seemed to achieve these goals, there are also many stories from women for whom polygamy left them feeling unloved and lonely, struggling with depression, living in poverty, relying on their children and extended family for financial support, and more.<br />
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More than looking at women's rights, or polygamy, this book gives us a more complete look at the women who helped found the LDS faith. Much of the history that is commonly talked about circles around the male pioneers with women's names popping in and out of stories here and there. Maybe we've heard about Emma Smith or Eliza Snow but even then it's only in stories where they are interacting with Jospeh Smith or Brigham Young. Not to mention there are so many other strong and dynamic women to learn about. What were these women’s lives like day to day? What were their thoughts on revelation, priesthood, marriage, and women’s rights?<br />
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At first I thought that we didn't talk about women's history because we just didn't have as many resources about the women. But the truth is we have notes, letters, journals, and pictures of the women. After reading several books about the lives of women I've concluded that we often don't talk about the women because we can't talk about them without acknowledging the parts of history we don't like to talk about as much like: polygamy, secret and exclusive societies in early mormonism, babies dying, saints disagreeing on things or even hating one another (like Brigham and Emma), the fact that women used to give blessings for the sick, that some of the notes from the first relief society meetings were altered by church leaders and have now been changed back, and even just the fact that pioneers sometimes complained or doubted. The author also mentions this idea. She says that some feel that the women's voices tell the other side of the story and that for some it takes away from the dominate narrative of miracles, and priesthood power, and faith unwavering. As LDS we do like to focus on the faith promoting views of history but we sometimes don't realize that the whole picture, including the failures and disappointments, can help us relate and empathize with the historical narrative and that can be just as faith promoting. <br />
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These women lived amazing lives. Many gave up money, status, stable homes, and health to travel across the country and build a community up in the middle of nothing. Their husbands were often gone on missions leaving them responsible to maintain the house, gardens, land, children and earn the money to support the family. Even when their husbands were home they were often doing the jobs in the spotlight and receiving much of the praise while the women do the quiet behind the scenes work. While many were happy with these roles, others were not. It's fascinating to read about their different accounts. This book will give you access to their actual words and thoughts through their letters and journals. Even more interesting were the letters they wrote but never sent. The grief they had to hold in, the anger that ebbed and flowed, the doubt they tried not to feel. I loved realizing that they struggled with those things too.<br />
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The author also uses their husband and leaders journals, letters and speeches to help us see that sometimes the men and women would see the same history quite differently. Although dealing with much different issues than we do today, it was interesting to see the dynamics between the genders in family life, church and social gatherings. While it was often hard to read some of the teachings going on at that time in regard to gender (such as women cannot be saved without a man, Women should have no say in the leadership of their family or they will incur the wrath of God, Men can’t help but wanting more than one woman, the higher up your husband’s calling the better chance you have for salvation, the more wives you have the higher up your exaltation, and that men should try not to love their wives too much) it was also very touching to read how much some of these men did love their wives and how they were often just as confused and hurt by the polygamist system as the women.<br />
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The author does a good job of using many women's voices too so that we get to see the diversity among the women of that time. We often see them all in black and white pictures and they tend to look the same and we combine that with one or two quotes from from Eliza Snow and we begin to think they all thought the same way too. But they were diverse in their thoughts and feelings. This book lets us see how they used that diversity to build a community, form organizations and committees to help with education, health, women’s rights, and spiritual improvement. Using voice of well known women (Eliza, Emma and Zina), notable women (such as Phebe Woodruff, Mary Richards, and Sarah Kimball), and many women who I previously had not heard of (Augusta Cobb), the author is able to help us see how these women interacted with those who agreed with them and those who didn’t. How they were able to come together and also what sometimes held them apart.<br />
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It was also very interesting to read about the women’s rights movement happening all around the country at the time. It was interesting to read about Susan B. Anthony and Amelia Bloomer. Even thought these women were advocating for a very different life for women that what the Utah polygamist wives were advocating. They were on some points able to unite in their common goal of giving the women the right to vote so that each woman could have the right to pick the type of life she wanted and have a voice in local and national politics of the day. How wonderful it would be if in today’s world we could focus more on the things we have in common in order to get things done instead of refusing to work with people whose political leanings seem so different from our own.<br />
If you have any interest in LDS history or the history of women’s rights this is a great read! <br />
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-83938210321057269592018-01-02T11:34:00.003-08:002018-01-02T11:34:51.020-08:00Book Review: The Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic and Madness at the Fair That Changed America<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/21996.The_Devil_in_the_White_City" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="The Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic, and Madness at the Fair That Changed America" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1312066724m/21996.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/21996.The_Devil_in_the_White_City">The Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic, and Madness at the Fair That Changed America</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/5869.Erik_Larson">Erik Larson</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2219087896">3 of 5 stars</a><br />
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This book started out slow but really picked up steam throughout. The ending was intense and seriously creepy. The author does a good job of letting you feel the tension mounting and unraveling the story faster and faster as the book moves forward. I am seriously amazed at how little I knew about the history and events covered in this book. At the end of each chapter I found myself asking, "How have I never heard about this before?"<br />
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The book tells two main stories and for the most part alternates between the two every chapter. The first story is that of the Chicago World's Fair and the second is of H.H.Holmes, a seemingly wealthy and charming business owner/hotel manager/fraud/bigamist/murderer/psychopath who lives in Chicago during the fair.<br />
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I'll be honest that in the beginning of this book the two stories seemed pretty unequally yoked and I found myself rushing through the chapters detailing the conversations and business meetings leading up to the fair so that I could find out what crazy pants Holmes was going to do next. However, while the business details of the fair were slow and tedious at times to follow, the descriptions of the construction and exhibits of the fair itself were amazing. The descriptions of beauty and innovation sometimes seemed other worldly. It reminded me at times of the Night Circus only it is something that actually existed. It was interesting to read about the construction that was fraught with terrible weather, freak accidents, construction deaths, etc. I also enjoyed reading about the exhibits- the ferris wheel, modern electricity, shredded wheat, and more. I was also stunned to learn that an assassin ruined the closing ceremonies...again, how have I never heard about this?<br />
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The history of H.H. Holmes was insane. Often referred to as the first american serial killer he built an apartment building (also used as a Hotel during the world's fair) full of secret passages, air tight rooms, secret chutes to the basement and torture chambers. He killed friends, family, strangers, business partners, etc. Sometimes to collect insurance money, sometimes to cover up other lies, and mostly just for the thrill of it. Sometimes he cremated the bodies himself and other times he sold the bodies to medical schools as cadavers or skeletons. <br />
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While he's doing all of this he somehow finds the time to get married to several different women and have two children. He even lets two of his wives live. The scary part is how he manages to commit these horrendous crimes while still playing the part of normal, successful, charming business man and husband. Amazingly as girlfriends, secretaries, and acquaintances go missing he is questioned several times by family, neighbors, police, and private investigators and is still never suspected. Everyone seems to just keep believing him when he says they went back to live with their parents, or they eloped with another suitor, or they were hiding from ex-lovers. <br />
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He also cheats and steals from others using several different aliases and businesses owned by the different aliases. When people come to collect money he simply blames the debt on one of his other aliases to divert the attention and punishment away from himself. He is finally arrested on a charge of fraud against an insurance company who believes he faked the death of his business partner. During the investigation they find out that he actually murdered his business partner for the insurance claim and that his partners three children are now missing. As the investigators search for the three children they uncover all of his horrific secrets.<br />
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The scariest part for me was in the end that he really believed he was the Devil and that many of the people who helped bring him to justice seemed to be cursed afterward. A very creepy ending to an already creepy story. That again left me thinking "How have I never heard of this before?".<br />
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While this book was definitely not one I would have picked up on my own it had some fascinating history and I'm excited to discuss it for book group. <br />
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-58366823683919309182017-12-01T14:22:00.000-08:002017-12-01T14:25:51.687-08:00Book Review: The Four Tendencies<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/33566873-the-four-tendencies" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="The Four Tendencies: The Indispensable Personality Profiles That Reveal How to Make Your Life Better (and Other People's Lives Better, Too)" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1501487753m/33566873.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/33566873-the-four-tendencies">The Four Tendencies: The Indispensable Personality Profiles That Reveal How to Make Your Life Better</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/21246.Gretchen_Rubin">Gretchen Rubin</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2197904001">3 of 5 stars</a><br />
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This is a quick look at how we set and accomplish goals and what motivates us to accomplish them.<br />
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The theory behind this book is that each of us falls into one of four tendencies. Upholders-motivated by internal and external expectations, Questioners- motivated internally, Obligers- motivated externally, and Rebels- Do what they want, not motivated by internal or external expectations.<br />
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Once you take the quiz at the beginning of the book, she breaks down each tendency into sections such as what motivates each tendency, strengths and weaknesses of each tendency, and how to deal with a spouse, coworker, medical patient, and child with each tendency. <br />
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There's also a section about different relationship pairings. I'm a questioner leaning toward rebel and my husband is an obliger leaning toward rebel. Which was really surprising! We are both quite stubborn but in different ways and for different reasons! When I rebel it's because I think that I know better than everyone else and my husband rebels because he doesn't want people to tell him what to do. So as you can guess that can be an interesting dynamic in a marriage! haha!<br />
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While it was an interesting premise I wasn't totally sold on each of us fitting into one box and staying there our entire life. I really felt like in certain situations I could be motivated in different ways. However, I did fall under questioner and leaned toward rebel so that could have something to do with me questioning the validity of the test. It was funny because as I was having these thoughts the book itself even validated that questioners would be the most skeptical about their results. <br />
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There were a lot of things that rung true for me as I read about my questioning tendency. I'm definitely "crackpot material" like she says and I definitely like to research things out before I leap. I sometimes get bogged down in analysis paralysis but I also get things done on time when I need to. I do find myself questioning authority quite a bit and I really hate arbitrary or inefficient rules or the answer of "that's the way we've always done it". I feel like it's super important to understand "why" you are doing something, especially when you are recommending others do it too. And I'm sure that I exhaust people (including myself at times) with my endless list of questions. I didn't really identify with the part where she said questioners don't like to be questioned. I enjoy debates a lot and love philosophy discussions, etc. I do feel frustrated when in a debate with someone who I don't feel has done enough research though so maybe that's what she means by not liking to be questioned.<br />
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I identified quite a bit with the rebel mentality also. Which I was surprised by since I live a pretty conservative life. However, I enjoy doing things differently than other people and surprising others by defying their expectations of what I might say or do next. I don't like being told I can't do something and motivate myself quite often by thinking of people who want me to fail. Like before I ran my half marathon I had someone tell me they didn't think I could do it because of my weight and my want to prove him wrong was more motivating than visualizing the finish line or anything like that! I have no problem breaking rules (especially arbitrary ones-see questioner). <br />
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I also change what I do for hobbies or jobs quite a bit. I do preschool, now I'm a runner, now I'm decorating cakes, I'm going to write a book, etc. When something becomes an expectation I find it a lot harder to do things. Like when I made cakes for fun and for free I never felt stressed and could do several a day. Once I started getting paid for cakes and was stuck to a baking schedule I suddenly felt a lot of anxiety about it! I also find it easier to help someone when I just think of doing it on my own as opposed to someone asking me. And on occasion I've not done something that were in my best interest just because someone else told me to do it. However, I think a lot of this still falls in the questioner category because a true rebel doesn't like anyone telling them what to do but I'm fine with some people telling me what to do if they have researched it out, explained why I should and I trust them as an authority. <br />
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Although I definitely saw myself within her framework I didn't feel like it was super spot on or revolutionary. I've definitely read other personality type books that seemed to peg me a little better. I also didn't feel like it necessarily gave much insight into how to use your strengths to make your life better or how to overcome weaknesses. And there were definitely some major biases on the part of the author. It was pretty easy to tell which of the tendencies she thought were good and which needed some work. She was an upholder and pretty much defended every choice ever made by an upholder and didn't really seem to do that for the others. But that's just my perception and as a questioner/rebel I'm probably biased against upholders a little bit. Sorry Ms. Rubin!<br />
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I am so excited to discuss this with my book group though. Excited to hear what others thought and what groups they are in. I think it will definitely have a great discussion!<br />
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-77990947551603549942017-11-28T11:00:00.003-08:002017-11-28T11:00:24.392-08:00Book Review: The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1618.The_Curious_Incident_of_the_Dog_in_the_Night_Time" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1479863624m/1618.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1618.The_Curious_Incident_of_the_Dog_in_the_Night_Time">The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/1050.Mark_Haddon">Mark Haddon</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2063709076">2 of 5 stars</a><br />
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I really wanted to like this book. I really though I was going to. I'd read several good reviews and had a couple people recommend it. <br />
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The book is unique in that the main character and narrator, Christopher, is Autistic thus giving us a look at what it might be like to view the world through his eyes and mind. Christopher can't be touched, he loves animals but has trouble relating to people, and is gifted in memorization and mathematics. I enjoyed the main characters humor, his self awareness as he's writing the book (he often says things like my friend said not to put this in but I"m going to anyway), and the fact that each chapter is counted by only prime numbers. <br />
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However, even with the neat things this book has going for it, they weren't enough to redeem the fact that there isn't much of a plot happening. The book felt a lot longer than it was and ending is pretty anticlimactic. The only real peak in the story happens about half way through and then you're left with 80 more pages to describe one trip on a train. <br />
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It also felt like in a few places that this book was written with the sole purpose of trying to win awards...which it did. I also pretty much hated all the other characters other than Christopher and Siobhan. All the adults were angry and self absorbed. Every stranger he met says the f word every other word. Other than Christopher every other character was basically the same character, not fleshed out at all. Maybe that is supposed to be because Christopher has a hard time reading people or connecting emotionally? Or maybe it's just lazy writing on the part of the author.<br />
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I also think a lot of people read this book and felt like maybe they had learned more about autism when really this is a fiction book written by someone with very little interaction with or knowledge on the subject. The author in interviews and on his blog has even talked about the fact that he's been asked to speak about it several times and has to decline because he didn't really research it that much and isn't an expert. While this voice may ring true for some people with autism, it's important to remember that within the autistic population each person is unique (as are we all) and that this isn't representative of how they all see and interact with the world.<br />
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Save yourself some time and skip this one. There are better books out there!
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-53676287471431740752017-11-04T13:56:00.001-07:002017-11-04T13:56:12.843-07:00Book Review: Wintergirls <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/5152478-wintergirls" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Wintergirls" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1346343878m/5152478.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/5152478-wintergirls">Wintergirls</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/10003.Laurie_Halse_Anderson">Laurie Halse Anderson</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2063720054">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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This book is haunting. The writing is beautiful and bleak at the same time. The author delves deep into the world of eating disorders in a fictional narrative that explores the thoughts, feelings, history and compulsions behind addiction in many forms.<br />
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It is written from the viewpoint of a teenage young woman dealing with anorexia whose best (and also estranged) friend has just died. We are kind of dropped into the middle of the story at this point and must wait to find out how her friend died, why they are estranged, why the main character is anorexic, how that applies to the death of her friend, etc.<br />
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As I read the viewpoint of this teenage girl and the things she believes are truth and the way she views her parents and family I was really haunted by what things I might unintentionally be doing or not doing that could eventually lead my children to have some of the recurring negative thoughts this young woman has. As we get glimpses of what leads to her eating disorder, and friend choices, and decision to cut herself, we begin to see the entire tapestry of what leads people to make certain choices. It made me think about the things that have affected my own tapestry but also how I affect others.<br />
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The complexity with which the story is told leads the reader to realize there is no easy or quick fix to these problems. It also shows us the inseparable connection between our mental health and our physical health. It challenges our perceptions of the world and helps us, for a few hundred pages, to perceive the world from the viewpoint of someone who is in a very dark place. It is hard to convince someone that they are not seeing truth. It's hard to convince someone who is stuck in darkness to believe there is light out there. Or someone who is stuck in winter that Spring will come.<br />
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Beyond the plot of this book I also really enjoyed the actual writing style. The main character becomes so alive for the reader as we get to hear her every thought. And why she thinks that. And the story behind why she thinks that. The author manages to do this without being boring or bogging us down with lengthy descriptions of past events. There were many parts where I could feel exactly what the main character was feeling or see the world the way she wanted us to.<br />
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The writing is also very poetic. While she does use a basic narrative style for some of the story, it is interspersed between sections of beautiful poetry. There were many paragraphs that could stand alone and be discussed at length without the surrounding book text. I think that is the mark of a gifted author. <br />
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Can't wait to discuss it at book group! <br />
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-3306676101967554182017-11-04T13:22:00.004-07:002017-11-04T13:22:38.063-07:00Book Review: Mother's Milk: Poems in Search of Heavenly Mother<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35897777-mother-s-milk" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Mother's Milk: Poems in Search of Heavenly Mother" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1501646681m/35897777.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35897777-mother-s-milk">Mother's Milk: Poems in Search of Heavenly Mother</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/13834373.Rachel_Hunt_Steenblik">Rachel Hunt Steenblik</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2174011507">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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A beautiful book of poetry! I echo so many of the thoughts she shares in this book but still had my ideas pushed and gained a lot of new things to ponder as I read her words.<br />
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It's a very quick read but I found it more enjoyable to break it up throughout the week so that I could take time to think about what I was reading.<br />
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There are so many things I could talk about but I'll limit it to my two favorite take away insights. First, One of her poems relates our spiritual desire to find our Heavenly Mother to a baby who fell asleep by their mother and wakes up to her absence and is scared and cries. This was a beautiful description of the way I have been feeling in regard to my Heavenly Mother. While an absence of information didn't bother me through much of my youth as a grown woman it was like I suddenly realized I didn't know where she was and how much I needed to know where she was. That absence made me scared and for a long time I cried and was angry about it but have now been soothed and know that this process was important for my growth. <br />
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Many of her poems are inspired by quotes and insights from others that she acknowledges in her titles and her notes. My other favorite insight was from Chieko Okasaki and makes an appearance in a couple of the author's poems. It is that when we hug someone tightly we can't see their face. Could it be that our ignorance about our Heavenly Mother isn't because she is so far away but because she is so close that we have been looking past her. As I've started to look for Her more closely I've found in her presence in so many places. Nature, child birth, womankind, temple worship, the words of my spiritual foremothers, etc.<br />
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This book was inspiring on many levels for me. 1) It reminded me that I have a Heavenly Mother who loves me 2) This knowledge empowers me as I am a mother (not only to my children but to all that I help nurture through kindness and service) 3)It helped me know that I'm not alone in this journey, or in having these questions, or in my thirst for more knowledge about my Mother. 4) It made me want to start back up writing poetry...a talent that I've neglected for too many years.<br />
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Definitely give this one a read!
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-23469453438206751022017-11-04T12:47:00.003-07:002017-11-04T12:49:48.751-07:00Book Review: Eve and the Choice Made in Eden<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/449545.Eve_and_the_Choice_Made_in_Eden" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Eve and the Choice Made in Eden" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1387738554m/449545.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/449545.Eve_and_the_Choice_Made_in_Eden">Eve and the Choice Made in Eden</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/252456.Beverly_Campbell">Beverly Campbell</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2128599712">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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I enjoyed this book and it gave me a lot to think about in regards to Mother Eve's story and how it relates to a woman's journey today.<br />
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I most appreciated the discussion about Eve and Adam's story and how little we really know about so much of what happened. Timeline, creation processes, etc. are all kind of loosely outlined but not really discussed in full. Because not all the details are there we tend to fill in those blanks using our own personal and cultural biases. The author gives some really good and thoughtful insights into the gaps of the story. She also fills in some of those gaps by talking with experts on biblical history, translation processes (and pitfalls), and the Hebrew language.<br />
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As I've been trying to more closely study the old testament I've really been impressed with the fact that tracing it back to the Hebrew is so important. When there are two words meaning similar but different things and the wrong one is picked it can make a huge difference in the way we view the scriptures. For instance...the hebrew word found in the creation story for God- Elohim-is a plural word and is always followed by plural verbs. Reading the creation story with the word Gods instead of God opens up the possibility for a Heavenly Mother and adds so much depth to the interactions between Eve and her creators. <br />
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Making sure to know the correct translations can also help with other aspects of the story too...what does help meet mean? What does it mean when it says that the man will rule the woman? Is it only Adam that is given dominion over all the earth? Understanding who is being spoken to in the story can be confusing in English because sometimes man means literally just the male gender but man can also mean mankind which includes all genders. Same with the word Adam in this story. Tracing things back to the original words can sometimes help to clear this up.<br />
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This book also does a nice job of discussing the obvious sticking point for many people in this story...what was Eve's intention and understanding when she partook of the fruit? And on a deeper level how does the answer to that question affect our view and treatment of women even today. This book echoes my own feelings in that Eve was fully aware of what she was doing and understood that only through sacrifice could the plan move forward. She chooses to partake of the fruit to become like her Heavenly Parents- gaining knowledge and with it the understanding of how to multiply seed and move mankind into a fully mortal sphere. In genesis Adam calls Eve the mother of all living after they partake of the fruit. Since eating the fruit has lead Adam and Eve into a state where they will die (mortality) Adam acknowledges that Eve's sacrifice makes her the mother of all living including himself. <br />
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In the second half of the book she addresses what this story means for men and women today and how we can relate what we learn from this story to our own lives. And while I do agree that the scriptures are meant to be living and applied to our lives I don't necessarily agree with all of the conclusions she draws. This book was written in the 1990's and I found some of the ideas about gender roles to be slightly dated. Not overly so but enough that they deviated from my own opinions. Like I mentioned above our interpretation of scripture is always effected by our own cultural biases (myself included). It was interesting to read about her opinions nevertheless. And I appreciated the quotes she used from scholars and religious authorities alike.<br />
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Over all I would definitely recommend this as a great jumping off point for learning more about Eve. It helped me appreciate her and my own womanness so much. In genesis we read that God will multiply woman's sorrow but in Moses 5 we get Eve's insight that the increase in sorrow is what eventually leads to the greatest increase of joy. I have gratitude for her quest for knowledge and for her sacrifice on my behalf and I'm grateful that I get to continue the work of Eve in my family and religious settings.
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-72109598092921892782017-10-30T15:53:00.000-07:002017-11-04T13:56:32.354-07:00Book Review: Revelation, Resistance, and Mormon Polygamy: The Introduction and Implementation of the Principle, 1830-1853<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17134315-revelation-resistance-and-mormon-polygamy" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Revelation, Resistance, and Mormon Polygamy: The Introduction and Implementation of the Principle, 1830–1853" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1477325847m/17134315.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17134315-revelation-resistance-and-mormon-polygamy">Revelation, Resistance, and Mormon Polygamy: The Introduction and Implementation of the Principle, 1830–1853</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6852502.Merina_Smith">Merina Smith</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2129838316">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Another great look at Mormon Polygamy. While the information overlaps with many of the other books I've read on the subject it also gives a lot of new insights and stories. It uses Rough Stone Rolling and In Sacred loneliness as a source and since I've already written detailed reviews of those books I won't go into too much detail about this book.<br />
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However, this book discusses the entirety of polygamy from beginning with secret polygamy in Nauvoo, through the martyrdom, across the plains, and living open polygamy in Utah.<br />
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The books I had previously read on the subject dealt mainly with the Nauvoo years or focused more on the people involved with polygamy only being a part of the story. This book faces Polygamy head on as a doctrine. The title tells you pretty much what you are going to get in terms of narrative through the book. The author discusses it from the believers point of view (revelation) and the non-believers point of view (resistance). We get to learn a little about the cultural influences leading up to the start of polygamy as well as the end of polygamy. <br />
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I enjoyed the stories of many different people living polygamy in different situations. I feel like the author does a good job of trying to share positive stories in between some of the harder stories. She is also good about looking in depth at quotes and accounts and pointing out cultural bias and the tendency we all have to remember history through rose colored glasses. We get to see the differences in what some people said publicly in speeches and accounts verses what the say in their private journals. It shows the complexity of the subject and the wrestle that many people underwent to live it.<br />
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It's also interesting to come at polygamy from the man's point of view, the woman's point of view, and the child's point of view. This book does a good job of showing that even people in the same family disagree about polygamy and each viewed their situation uniquely. <br />
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A few new areas this book covered were the relief society/Emma Smith's interactions with polygamy, and the stories of those inside and outside the faith that opposed polygamy and how this affected the transition after the martyrdom.<br />
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The author does a good job about seperating secret Nauvoo (polygamy) from public Nauvoo (professing to be anti-polygamy). While Emma Smith is the president of Relief Society she begins to hear rumors about secret Nauvoo. She then begins to send her councilors and friends out to try and stop the rumors about her husband and polygamy. The only problem was that the people she sent out to squelch the rumors were already secret polygamous wives of her husband and the rumors they were trying to stop were actually true. The author does a good job of explaining the time line and how things played out for those who were in the know about polygamy and those who were not. It also talks about Emma's ordeal with knowing about it but not knowing all about it. Trying to accept it but ultimately rejecting it. Loving her husband but wanting to leave. And also her decision to not go west with the saints. It also mentions that we don't have a journal for Emma, which would be very uncommon for a woman of her time not to have kept one. My secret wish is that it's in existance somewhere and that we get to see it someday!<br />
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Along with Emma there were also many high ranking authorities within the church who opposed polygamy. After Joseph and Hyrum are martyred, these opinions for and against polygamy are a key component in the debates over who should be the next prophet and what the organization of the church will look like. Emma Smith had believed that polygamy would die with her husband and when she learns that it wont and that it is far more widespread than she had known she aligns herself with the leadership of the high council who oppose polygamy and that is ultimately why she chooses to stay behind. Also her and Brigham really don't get along for a variety of reasons. But that's a discussion for another time.<br />
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Anyway, if you enjoy church history I would definitely recommend this book. I think cultural context is always important for understanding difficult topics like polygamy and this book gives a lot of context. I also enjoyed getting to read the journal entries and letters written by real people living through this period of church history. <br />
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-52806433676336878952017-10-12T15:31:00.001-07:002017-10-12T20:00:58.087-07:00Some Thoughts on How to Discuss Questions About Mormon History and Theology and Resources for Aiding That Discussion<div class="MsoNormal">
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">As some may have noticed,
I've been studying a lot about LDS history and theology lately. I've had
the chance to have a lot of great conversations about this with people and have
had several people ask how to go about finding good books to read on the topic.
I've also had a few people, not understanding where I'm coming from, who are
worried that I'm lost in dark paths because I've been researching these
things. Which was sad and confusing since I primarily rely on LDS sources
for all my information. So, I thought it would be a good time to write a post
about some good (church approved) resources for finding out about church
history. Hopefully it can help others who are interested in the topic
find what they're looking for and it can assure others that I'm not dipping my
toes in a fiery lake of doubt and misery.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">First things first, I have
a testimony of Jesus Christ. I have a testimony that we have loving
Heavenly Parents who love us and want us to return to them. I have a testimony
that by having charity (which is loving Christ by loving others the way he
would) we can do extraordinary things. While there are many beautiful and
amazing teaching provided by the LDS church, I fear that sometimes those basic
tenets of Christ's Atonement, Charity, Hope, and Faith get overshadowed by the
controversial topics of our history. Many of my friends outside of the
church know little of what our actual gospel message is and more about church
history, controversial topics like polygamy, and comments made by church leaders
regarding minority groups. Because these are the things people are going to ask
us about I think it's important for us to study them out so that we can have
answers. Having been on the side of questioner and answer-er I thought
I'd share some thoughts I had on how we can be more loving and welcoming to
those who think differently than we do. I don't think it's enough to just tell
people to ignore all the hard stuff and just focus on the good. Sometimes
it's by addressing the "hard" questions that we are prepared to
receive the good. I think that's true for people in and outside of the
church<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I know that not everyone
feels like they need or want to know about early church history, or the origins
of priesthood, or women and divinity and that's fine. Our faith is
individual and we come at it from many ways. Many people learn about
church history during their youth and get refresher courses every four years at
church and that is enough to build their faith. Which is great and honestly,
I think that is a spiritual gift. I also know that there are a lot of people,
like me, who approach things in a more questioning format and want to learn
more. For a long time, I considered my questioning nature to be an indication
that I didn't have enough faith but I now know that God gave me my questions to
lead me toward answers and that he loves me even if I take a little longer than
most to understand church doctrines (and maybe even if I have a few on my shelf
that I'm still not quite ready to deal with yet.) President Dieter F. Uchtdorf
said "Some might feel embarrassed or unworthy because they have searching
questions regarding the gospel, but they needn't feel that way. Asking
questions isn't a sign of weakness; it's a precursor of growth."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Sometimes in an effort to
be faith promoting I think we as a church membership focus on only the good
that happened and start to think of the pioneers of our faith as beyond
human. We've all probably heard people say things like "the pioneers
never complained" or they "never doubted". While that
black and white way of thinking can be motivating for some it can also be
demotivating for many others who think they will never stack up. As I've
learned about the good and the bad and read journals where pioneers doubt one
day and bear testimony the next I'm more able to see that these were real
people living real lives! The point of the gospel is not that you have to be
perfect in order to participate. The point is that through Christ we can all be
made perfect. When we realize that the pioneers were ordinary people doing
extraordinary things it becomes much more relevant and motivating than
hero-worship. As I learn more about the mistakes that were made and how
they were overcome I learn that God uses imperfect people to run his church.
And if they, imperfect as they were, could be of use, then maybe there is hope
for me as well. As I've jumped into family history more I've been very
impressed that it's time for me to really study out church history and
doctrines as well and face some of the troubling things head on. I've found
that in addition to stretching and strengthening me personally, it has
increased my love for those who have gone before me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I've been excited to share
what I'm learning with others who have questions or who struggle with the
history. I know that when I've had doubts or worries, having other to talk to
has been crucial in my church activity. We know from the scriptures that we
should seek things out in faith but also through gaining knowledge and discussing
that knowledge with others. Doctrine and Covenants 88:118 says "And as all
have not faith, seek ye diligently and teach one another words of wisdom; yea,
seek ye out of the best books words of wisdom; seek learning, even by study and
also by faith”. I'm so appreciative of those who have already travailed this
path and the insights they can give me and the encouragement to keep studying
and moving forward.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I'm also excited that my
kids will have the opportunity to be taught these things in their youth instead
of finding out at BYU (like I did) or even later in life that seminary and
Sunday school didn't quite show the complete picture. Some might think
that church history detracts from learning about the basic tenets and doctrines
of the gospel of Jesus Christ. However, the truth remains that learning
about our church history and previous revelations can help us understand the
doctrines we are presented with today. Some want to leave the past in the
past but the fact is that temple practices, priesthood ordination practices,
attitudes toward women, our view of the afterlife etc. are heavily impacted by
the practices of our ancestors in the early church and turning our head away
from these facts can only cause heartache down the road. When we don't
understand the real history and doctrines of the church we start to fill in the
gaps with our own ideas and that is when we get lost in church culture and vain
traditions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">When the church announced
the gospel topics essays Elder J. Devn Cornish (of the Seventy and also the
executive director of the Church History Department at the time) said: “Gone
are the days when the history of the Church is just interesting. Gone are the
days when it is only important. In our day, the history of the Church is
urgent...Our history can either be used as a weapon against the faith of our
members or as a bulwark to build and protect their faith". I hope that by
helping my kids know about this history early on it will lessen their chance of
having it used as a weapon against them later.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">So even if your testimony
is rock solid about church history, I encourage you to learn more so that you
can be of help to those around you who do have questions (including our children).
And also, certainly, because over the next several years this history is going
to be incorporated more and more into the curriculum for youth and adults and
it's always better to learn it on your own time table than to be blindsided by
it in the middle of gospel doctrine class.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">While it is a great
blessing to have family, friends and associates to discuss things with and
while I've been blessed with many who have happily pointed me to good sources,
studied things out with me, discussed troublesome topics (sometimes multiple
times), and genuinely loved me even when I was at my most "faith
crisis" moments, I want to caution others to choose wisely who you choose
to open up to about your questions. Sometimes, unfortunately, our questions can
be met by others with anger or even condemnation. Some might feel
betrayed that we aren't as "steadfast" as they thought we were, some
people regard even the act of having questions as sinful, some don't understand
why we don't just rely on faith only, some are immature or unsure in their own
testimonies or understanding of church history or doctrines, and others hear
our questions only in terms of how it will affect them (what does this mean for
our friendship? What will others think of me if I associate with this person
who is questioning?", etc.).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">As a listener, it's
important to listen carefully to what is being said so that we don't misjudge
or jump to incorrect conclusions. In the LDS gospel topics essay about
answering gospel questions it says that we should 1) Show Compassion for the
person asking questions 2) Listen Carefully and 3) Fortify Faith. Don't
assume that because someone is questioning that they are doing it justify or
cover up their sins, or that they are trying to lead a rebellion away from the
church. Sure, those things could happen, but just because someone is asking
questions doesn't mean that they are doing those things. Also, as the person
asking the questions we need to make sure we can remain calm, not be too
aggressive and that we bring them up when we have time to explain where our
thoughts are coming from.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Sometimes the context for
your questions can help others better know what they can do to help. So before
I give my list of resources I used to help with my questions, I'd like to give
some context for my questions. For me, things came to a head after the birth of
my fifth child. I began to wonder what it means to be a woman, what was
God's plan for me as such, and how the gospel could help me navigate the many
changes and trials that occur in the life of women. I decided to really find out
what Heavenly Father thought of me as a daughter through prayer and
meditation. After praying about it for several weeks I decided to also
dedicate my scripture study time to see how other women had navigated the many
changes and demands that are required of women on their mortal journey. As I
studied, I became increasingly frustrated that there really aren't many
depictions of women outside of who they married or who they begat. I went
to the temple and although I feel uplifted there I also felt frustrated that I
still wasn't seeing my Heavenly Mother's hand in this or understanding Eve's
entire story. I won't go into my specific concerns or questions about that here
but click over to my <a href="http://thoughts.neighborjulia.com/2017/08/book-review-women-in-eternity-women-of.html"><span style="color: blue;">book review of Women in Eternity, Women of Zion</span></a> if
you'd like to know more about them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">From there I decided to
start seeking out books about women in the scriptures and particularly women in
the early LDS church. However, as I began to dive in to their stories, I
realized that while I did have some things in common with them, our lives
really looked so different! Many of these women practiced polygamy,
actively talked about Heavenly Mother, gave each other healing blessings for
the first 80+ years of the church, and received and spake revelations for one
another through the gift of tongues. Having studied many of these things
before (I always took more than a full load of classes at BYU so that I could
take extra religion classes each semester) I didn't think I would be that
shocked by what I found. It also became apparent that as the Sunday curriculum
has shied away at times from addressing polygamy (even changing some of the
quotes in the Brigham Young manual from "wives" to "wife")
that some of these women's lives have been unintentionally overlooked for many
years. While I understand that changing quotes to sound more monogamous
helps us to better relate to the lessons on marriage, it sometimes also
accidentally distances us from these amazing women.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">So, with all that in mind
let me get into where we can turn to learn more about church history, women of
the church, and more! The Church History department has collaborated with so
many different researchers to make sure that we can now have access to records,
journals, pictures and stories that most church members have never had access
to before (either because they were part of private collections, authenticity
or context were still under debate, or because previous generations have
worried that some of the "harder" parts of church history were not
faith promoting). The cool thing about a lot of the historical papers and books
that are being put out today is that they are written for people in and outside
of the faith and give a more accurate and complete version of our
history. While much of this information has been available for awhile-
timeline corrections, what was said, who said it, and so many things that
previously were glossed over, are now being presented to the membership in
detail and in easier to find places.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The gospel topics essays
are a great place to start. While they are still not perfect (and will
continue to change as new research comes to light) they give a very good
overview of some of the more sensitive topics in our history and
doctrines. They've been put together by the church history department and
are supported by numerous books and resources that are provided by the top
historians and researchers of LDS history. They are also approved by the First
Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve. You can read more about the essay
topics, their approval process and their uses by visiting the <a href="https://www.lds.org/topics/essays?lang=eng"><span style="color: blue;">essay
overview page.</span></a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Right now these essays
include a range of topics such as are Mormon's Christian, Heavenly Mother, the
Book of Mormon and DNA, Polygamy in Nauvoo, Polygamy in Utah, priesthood
restrictions, Joseph Smith's teachings about women, becoming like God, and more.
You can access the complete list here: <a href="https://www.lds.org/topics?lang=eng"><span style="color: blue;">https://www.lds.org/topics.</span></a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Not only do these essays
give a good overview they also provide an amazing list of references that can
also guide your study. When you click on a topic you will often see the
first paragraph of text, related church resources and scriptures, and then
other suggested topics. Click on the show more link to be able to access
the whole text of the essay but also to access the full list of resources
used. There are dozens of books listed on most essays. I've really
had to increase my book budget as of late :) For recommendations of books that
I've personally read from these lists you can visit my <a href="http://thoughts.neighborjulia.com/p/book-reviews.html"><span style="color: blue;">book review page.</span></a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">In addition to book
references, there are also other websites, scriptures, BYU Studies article
links, and more.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Below is a list of some of
the online resources that are used in the essays and some sites that I have
found helpful in choosing which books to read. A lot of these cross paths
frequently or link to one another but I'm going to list them out separately.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="https://www.churchhistorianspress.org/"><span style="color: blue;">https://www.churchhistorianspress.org</span></a> -access
to the full text of relief society minutes and other documents, also provides
information about current books being published and news in the world of LDS
church history.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="http://www.josephsmithpapers.org/"><span style="color: blue;">http://www.josephsmithpapers.org/ </span></a>-full
text of revelations, meetings, journals, and more from the early church.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="https://byustudies.byu.edu/"><span style="color: blue;">https://byustudies.byu.edu/</span></a> -I've
found some awesome articles here about all kinds of topics. Biblical
evidences, Mother in Heaven, Book of Mormon historical context, Hebrew
translation, etc. A really cool feature is under study resources- For each Sunday
School lesson they have linked all their past articles that pertain to that
particular topic.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="https://mi.byu.edu/"><span style="color: blue;">The Neal A Maxwell
Institute</span></a> -for religious scholarship at BYU. (Particularly the
Mormon Studies review which can be found under their publications tab. I
recently watched a really interesting podcast about the combining of FARMS into
the Neal A. Maxwell Institute and the shift of scholarship being written for a
wider audience. The Mormon Studies Review, rather than publishing new
material, is a review of new articles, journals and books being put on a
variety of topics within Mormonism. This one does cost $10 for a yearlong
digital pass, but it's really cool!)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="http://history.lds.org/"><span style="color: blue;">History.lds.org</span></a> -From
here you can access several of the other resources I've listed here. It
also has publications and another whole list of online resources that you can
check out there.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="https://history.lds.org/section/revelations?lang=eng"><span style="color: blue;">Revelations in Context </span></a> -This is found
on lds.org and you've probably seen links to it in your sunday school manuals
for Doctrine and Covenants. It's a great resource to get some
understanding for what was happening during times of revelation. It also
tells us the story from other people's points of view that lived during that
time. You'll also find links to other research sources such as the Joseph Smith
Papers and church historians press listed above.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="http://www.womeninthescriptures.com/"><span style="color: blue;">Women in
the Scriptures Blog</span></a> -While this blog isn't just about church
history it is fascinating! She also has some really good book reviews and
recommendations that have really helped me understand more about women in all
of the scriptures, Eve's story, Emma Smith and more.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/"><span style="color: blue;">Amazon </span></a> and <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/"><span style="color: blue;">Goodreads</span></a> book
reviews- When deciding which books I want to read I often turn to the book
reviews on Amazon or Goodreads to see what others have to say about it and how
it helped them in their life. I also research who the authors are and
what other books they may have written. I usually look at what seems to be the
overall tone of the reviews. Is it people who are genuinely searching for
answers to their questions or is it people who are looking for new ammunition
to shoot back at the church. They can be so helpful in deciding if a book will
be a good fit for you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Well, I know this has been
a long blog post but I hope it might be of some help to others. For those
who have questions I hope it lets you know that you're not alone, there are
places you can go to find answers and that our Heavenly parents love you!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">For those who don't have
questions I hope that it might give you some good ideas of where you can turn
to learn more, that you can have more empathy for those who do have questions
and that maybe it will help you to feel less awkward in having conversations
with your brothers and sisters who approach the gospel differently than you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">And for those who aren't
LDS I hope that it can give you some resources to learn more about this
religion or at the very least help you understand why my Goodreads list has
been so boring sounding lately :)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "-webkit-standard","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">My main hope always,
whether you agree with my positions or not, is that my post can at least
promote charity and understanding between all people inside and outside of the
LDS church. So, please let me know if you have any questions I can help with or
leave a comment with your favorite resources to use in your religious study! I
love hearing from you all!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
</div>
Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-22837645897216392342017-09-20T12:22:00.000-07:002017-09-20T12:22:33.103-07:00Book Review: The Assertiveness Guide for Women: How to Communicate Your Needs, Set Healthy Boundaries, and Transform Your Relationships by Julie de Azevedo Hanks<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/27214316-the-assertiveness-guide-for-women" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="The Assertiveness Guide for Women: How to Communicate Your Needs, Set Healthy Boundaries, and Transform Your Relationships" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1463043092m/27214316.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/27214316-the-assertiveness-guide-for-women">The Assertiveness Guide for Women: How to Communicate Your Needs, Set Healthy Boundaries, and Transform Your Relationships</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/7190901.Julie_de_Azevedo_Hanks">Julie de Azevedo Hanks</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2063709718">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
<br />
Lots of really good insights and ideas in this book. It's specifically for women but I felt like there was a lot of great information for all genders. It paired really well with so many of the things my therapist is having me work on too and really made me look at myself and others in new ways.<br />
<br />
Being assertive in our communication means being able to take care of ourselves and others in our problem solving. Other ways of communicating are aggressive, passive aggressive and just passive. When we deviate from assertive and become aggressive we might get what we want temporarily but we don't foster good relationships or end up getting we need long term. When we communicate passively we might temporarily keep the peace but we don't get we want and we might end up with a lot of resentment or a blow up later.<br />
<br />
To discover what type of communicator we are Julie Hanks also has look at what kind of attachment we are most comfortable with. She starts by taking you back to your family or origin and discussing the attachment styles we pick up very early on in life and how those styles can effect our communication as adults. The three attachment styles she discusses are secure, anxious and avoidant. <br />
<br />
An anxious style can lead us to be overly connected or clingy, distraught about separation, dependant on others for validation, and give us an unhealthy view of where we end and another person begins. It can also lead to depression or anxiety when we don't live up to expectations of those we are close to. This obviously can be a barrier to healthy assertive communication. <br />
<br />
An avoidant style can hinder our ability to have close relationships, cause us to feel unattached, makes us unaware of our own emotions, or cause us to cover things up or not confront problems. This can make for bigger problems later on by leading to depression or the realization that we haven't really "let things go" and is a barrier to assertive communication also.<br />
<br />
It was interesting to discuss this with my husband and see that we are in fact totally opposite in our attachment styles and communication. I have a very anxious attachment style while his was avoidant. Maybe that means our kids will be secure? :)<br />
<br />
The author says that chances are we won't be able to totally change our attachment style but knowing what we do and why we do it helps us to work within our attachment style to find a place of assertiveness. If we know what our negative tendencies are (not to speak up, lashing out, etc.) we can replace them with positive actions. The way she sets out for us to do this is by learning about our emotions.<br />
<br />
As we begin to identify our emotions we can seperate our thoughts and feelings. The way she has us do this is by using this sentence: I feel _______ when________ because I thought ___________. Example would be I felt mad when you didn't take out the trash because I thought you were ignoring me and didn't love me. <br />
<br />
I've been working with my therapist about this and she has the same sentence seperated out into I felt _____ when ____ because I have a need for ______. And the author of this book discusses seperating our needs and wants from our thoughts and feelings also. It's hard for others to give you what you want or need if you don't even know what you want or need. That is why it's so important to figure it out. <br />
<br />
She also discusses what barriers we set up for ourselves in the way of assertive communication. Some of these might be not wanting to make things worse, not wanting to make anyone mad, feeling guilty about putting our needs at the forefront, not wanting to be misunderstood, etc. One that I keep coming back to in my own life is that I feel like it's selfish to have wants or needs. Like I can't be a good enough mom, wife, pto member, etc. if I have needs that also have to be met. I also have a fear of being a burden or dissapointment to others. If I could just have no opinions or desires it would be totally perfect for everyone I'm sure ;)<br />
<br />
Since the author is writing this specifically for women she also talks about the cultural and societal factors that impact our gender. In our society there is a huge emphasis put on women's ability to care for others and sometimes we take that to the next step of not caring for ourselves at all. Being assertive helps us take care of others and ourselves. Part of this is the art of saying no! She gives a lot of good advice on finding balance in our lives and being able to say no to things we cannot do. She talks about being able to know when we are feeling resentful, or overly burdened, or when we are stretching ourself too thin. Being in touch with our emotions helps us take better care of ourselves. And when we take better care of ourselves we have more and better things to give to others.<br />
<br />
She then takes us through the practices of self relection, self awareness, self soothing, self expression and self expansion. One of my favorite parts was the act of self soothing. She sets out an exercise for us to do. When we feel upset about something she suggests doing for ourselves what we might do for someone else. Rubbing our arm or giving ourself a hug and saying things like "of course your upset. This and this and this happened. You've been working so hard. That must be so dissapointing". By soothing ourself before we confront someone else we can get to the root of our problems and address those with others instead of just reacting out of anger. When we can stay in control of our emotions then we have a better chance of communicating them to others.<br />
<br />
She also goes through some really amazing steps that we need to take before we communicate. Great ideas about starting conversations softly and paying attention to body language before we jump into hard topics. She also has some good advice on setting up boundaries and dealing with toxic personalities who aren't receptive even to the most assertive communications. <br />
<br />
I felt really empowered by this book and have also been able to use it and see it's benefits in my life already. I've been able to more effectively apologize when I'm wrong, and I've stopped myself from apologizing for things I don't really need too. I'm been able to smooth out a hard situation and been able to set up boundaries for myself. Reading this in partnership with some of Brene Brown's work has helped me to let go of some of that gender shame I pull around with me. Internal dialogues like I'm not good enough, I'm being selfish, etc. And it's really helped me to better see people and respond to them in appropriate ways. As I gain confidence in speaking up for myself in assertive ways I don't have to worry or feel guilty for how they choose to treat me because I know that I've tried to do my best. It's helped me realize that sometimes others are just unreasonable and that it's okay if I can't please everyone. I still fail at all these things A LOT but I'm at least more concious of my pitfalls and how to avoid them. I highly recommend this book!<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/list/403325-julia">View all my reviews</a>
Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-5336629790357219452017-08-23T07:25:00.001-07:002017-08-23T07:27:06.740-07:00Genesis- PoemGenesis (Julia Layman 2000)<br />
<br />
Dark washes the house,<br />
turns the brown paint dark auburn<br />
wrapped in the moonlight.<br />
Naked feet bathed in grass blades.<br />
I hear as the door closes,<br />
as the slightly rusted knob is turned<br />
and the hose begins to water the grass.<br />
I quietly watch through the window.<br />
My parents stand quietly together<br />
looking over the yard.<br />
Making sure each blade of grass gets watered.<br />
Making sure each plant is trimmed and cared for.<br />
I watch them<br />
standing there bare foot,<br />
under one small street lamp, <br />
next to their favorite part of the yard.<br />
Silhouettes, barely seen.<br />
Their presence is known more in the loveliness of the ground<br />
then by their actual movements.<br />
They say they like the feeling of night on grass.<br />
In Genesis God walked through the cool of the garden.Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-17791812585586176172017-08-23T07:08:00.001-07:002017-08-23T07:08:13.554-07:00Beauty- PoemBeauty Extends (Poem by Julia Layman circa 2002)<br />
<br />
Beauty extends<br />
but there is nothing within.<br />
We see nothing beyond our faces.<br />
We've become hollow cups,<br />
decorated in jewels and painted like fine china.<br />
So we place ourselves on high ornate shelves.<br />
Where we cannot be hurt,<br />
nor can we serve.<br />
For we are too easily chipped and too easily offended.<br />
<br />
An empty crystal glass is beautiful<br />
but will not save from thirst.<br />
When we find ourselves in the desert,<br />
we will long for the steady wooden saucers<br />
filled to the brim with water.<br />
What will we do when those saucers are gone?<br />
When we've all hardened our hearts into crystal?<br />
<br />
Beauty extends- <br />
Swallows us up.We wrap it around us so tight we practically disappear.<br />
we cover our chips, and cracks, and wrinkles. <br />
And we think beauty is only in the fixed. <br />
That beauty can only be found in the new.<br />
Never realizing the value of the chips.<br />
Never seeing the beauty in the cracks.<br />
Like super-glueing arms on the Venus de Milo. <br />
<br />
Beauty extends.<br />
It takes over our lives.<br />
We've forgotten what our lives are for.<br />
We've forgotten who gave them to us.<br />
We recreate ourselves in our own image.<br />
Working from the outside in.<br />
Rushed sense of perfection.<br />
Our world crumbles in the tests of the desert.<br />
<br />
Beauty extends. <br />
It extends too quickly<br />
and is broken off.<br />
Happiness is just a shelf up.<br />
We stretch to reach.<br />
Happiness is just a size down.<br />
We pour ourselves out trying to fit among the<br />
crystal we see on the post-cards, on the billboards, in our mind.<br />
We've forgotten the value of water,<br />
of inner beauty, of self. <br />
<br />
A false sense of beauty,<br />
a rising thirst.<br />
Where the shallow drink last<br />
and the steady drink first. Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-24673459111659619102017-08-16T09:01:00.002-07:002017-08-16T09:19:06.740-07:00We Are Not Innocent Bystanders...and We Haven't Been for a Long TimeIt's easy in today's world to feel helpless and small. It's easy to read articles and see injustices and think that the world's problems are too big to deal with or too big for us to fix. We might feel far away from the problem. We might feel like we have enough problems of our own. We might feel frightened to get involved, worried what others might think, or that we might say the wrong thing. In general we become overwhelmed and we often detached. Maybe we stop even watching or reading the news. Maybe we stop talking about it with other people. Maybe we try to forget or maybe we even start to convince ourselves that things aren't really that bad after all.<br />
<br />
I go through this pattern myself at times. And I have to admit that I started down this same path after I read about Charlottesville. My heart hurt and my head hurt and I honestly just wanted to turn the other way and pretend I hadn't read anything about it. I felt sad, and angry, and honestly horrified.<br />
<br />
I've seen a lot of articles talking about the terrorists and bullies in this situation. And I've seen a lot of articles talking about the victims. But what I'd like to talk about another key player in our world situation and that is the bystander. We've often heard bystanders referred to as innocent bystanders. The reason we use the word "innocent" is because up until whatever event they are about to witness they are innocent. They aren't planning to hurt anyone or be hurt by anyone. They are simply there when the event happens. HOWEVER, and this is important, once the innocent bystander has witnessed something, like Charlottesville, they are no longer innocent. They've now been enlightened. They've seen something happen and they must make decisions. What they say or do from that point on is now conditioned on what they saw, or heard, or read. And because they are no longer innocent or ignorant they can no longer remain in innocent silence. Silence says something. Silence sends messages. Silence condones.<br />
<br />
One of my favorite quotes by Maya Angelou is "I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better." If you didn't know the alt-right existed until last week, fine, but now you know. And if you didn't know that there were people out there so filled with hate that they could plow over a crowd of people with their car and then reverse, fine, but now you know. Or you didn't think you'd ever see the day where a group of people walked down the street holding Nazi signs and lanterns and the President won't even call them out for what they are, now you have seen it, now you know. So now that you know, what will you do??<br />
<br />
The first thing we must do is start acknowledging others' pain,
even pain that isn't ours, even pain that we don't understand. And that means we might also have to acknowledge that sometimes we
have contributed to that pain just by ignoring the fact that it
exists. I've thought a lot about the Black Lives Matter movement. I've heard the
argument against them saying "all lives matter". But saying black lives
matter doesn't mean that all lives don't matter. It is saying we know
all lives matter but some have not felt part of that "all". They are
saying, "Hey remember us, we are part of the all, we matter". <br />
<br />
Sometimes
in an effort to help, we respond "of course you're part of the all, everyone knows that" or "of course you matter, you don't have to tell me" and
while on the surface that seems like a good thing to say it doesn't
acknowledge the hurt and therefore it doesn't move past it. When
someone tells us they feel hurt we have to stop and ask them about it and let them talk about it.
How have they been hurt? What can we do to help the healing process?
Sometimes just the acknowledging of hurt helps to heal it just a little.<br />
<br />
We can try and have empathy by thinking about times that we haven't felt part of the "all" and think how we feel when our worries are dismissed as non-existent by others who have never had to deal with our same worry. As a woman I know sexism exists and it's frustrating when people don't acknowledge it. As an overweight person I know prejudice exists and it's frustrating when people think it's okay to make "fat jokes". As the mother of a special needs child I know that ignorance exists and it's painful when people I love still vote for presidential candidates that make fun of cerebral palsy.<br />
<br />
And I know that most men in my life don't mean to be sexist but sometimes they make mistakes because they just don't know what it's like to be a woman. And I know my thin friends just want to help me when they give me weight loss advice but they just don't know what it's like to be so overweight you feel embarrassed to even head back to the gym. And I know my friends who voted for Trump didn't think his impression of the reporter was "that bad" because cerebral palsy just isn't something that is in their daily lives.<br />
<br />
Once I come from this place of empathy I can then turn the situation around and acknowledge that in many cases I'm the friend who doesn't know better, or doesn't think about what I'm saying, or just doesn't understand. And race issues, for me, is one of these areas. I don't know what it's like to be hated for the color of my skin. I've never been afraid to walk down the street because of the color of my skin. I've never walked in a room where I was in a racial minority. I don't know what that feels like. And even though I've always tried to not be racist I'm sure there are tons of times that I've been insensitive, made mistakes, and caused extra pain that I didn't even realize. So no, I will never experience racism first hand, but when I have friends, loved ones and others telling me that they have experienced it I have a responsibility to listen. To acknowledge their pain. To acknowledge that racism exists. If we didn't believe racism still exists a week ago, we certainly have to now! And once we know better, we have to do better!<br />
<br />
The second thing we can all do is to stop being silent. Whether you've been silent out of fear, or ignorance, or feeling like it didn't pertain to you, or just not knowing what to stay. Step up and say "This is not okay!".<br />
<br />
The third thing we need to do is to define what "this" is in very clear terms. So first let start with the things most of us can agree on that aren't okay. It's not okay to murder people. It's not okay to run people over with your car. It's not okay to hold up flags and symbols that were used by a group of people who slaughtered Jews, minorities, and their supporters. It's not okay to hate other people simply because they are a different- race, gender, economic bracket or religion from you. It's not okay to think yourself superior just because of your membership in a particular race, gender, economic bracket or religion. It's not okay to be the leader of the United States and not call the Neo-Nazis out by name just because you don't want to lose their political support. Especially when you seem fine calling out just about anyone else who doesn't tweet nice things about you or sell your daughter's clothes.<br />
<br />
From there we have to start talking about some of the "this" that we don't all agree on. When I say "This is not okay" I mean hatred and anger in all it's form. I know many people reserve the right to have a righteous anger. But the fact is that what is and isn't righteous is subjective. The alt-right think they are righteous in their anger. They think their lives have been harder because people are different than them. They see no value in the lives of those that are different than them. We hear that and we say, that's not true, every life has value. But then we turn around and call them "human garbage" or we say things like "I wish they were all dead". And when we say those things, even about people who make terrible choices, aren't we really just perpetuating the idea that some people don't have value? That it's okay to think of some people as "garbage"?<br />
<br />
I'm not saying that we need to try and see things from their side. Their side is completely misinformed and wrong. In fact what they are saying is a load of garbage. I'm not trying to defend them in any way. I'm just saying that I don't believe in human garbage. I believe humans believe garbage. They sometimes say garbage and treat others like garbage. But I'm not willing to say someone is just plain garbage. Yesterday I read a comment where someone said "They're Nazis, I think we're allowed to hate them". And it's true, you are allowed to hate Nazis. I'm just saying I don't think your hatred is going to change anything. We can't tell Nazis to stop living their life in anger and hate and then invite them over to our side of the fence when we're also living our life in anger and hate. I hate what Nazis believe. I hate what they do. But more than that want racism to stop because I love people. I love my friends and family no matter their gender, race, age or religion and I want them to be happy and safe. And not be hated or live their lives hating others. The love I have for people making good choices is greater than the hate I have for people making bad choices.<br />
<br />
Sometimes when we are hurt or kicked or scorned we think we are now justified to hurt, kick or scorn. But that action leads to someone else feeling justified to do that. And the next person. And the next generation. And there is no end. Not to mention us getting angry and fighting and acting out is exactly what they want us to do because it justifies their anger and hate.<br />
<br />
The only way to end hatred, the only way to end violence, is love. That doesn't mean we don't tell them their actions are wrong. That doesn't mean we don't stop them from hurting others. That doesn't mean we don't stand up for ourselves and for those around us. That doesn't mean we don't put them in jail when they run over people with their cars. But that means that our motivation in doing so is out of love for all our brothers and sisters, not hate. Martin Luther King said, "darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive hate, only love can do that".<br />
<br />
I would be lying if I said that I haven't ever felt anger or hatred. I have. But I can acknowledge that nothing good grew from either of those feelings. Anger might prick at our heart to let us know something is wrong. But it can't be the seed from which we act. When it comes to actions, if we want to be effective, we have to move beyond that initial anger or wound. It's easy to look at the college-aged alt-right marchers and just want to scream in their face about how privileged and spoiled and wrong they are. And that might make us feel better temporarily but it won't solve a problem. It's reacting to the symptoms, it's not actually treating the cause. It's a little harder to step back and ask- how can people so young be so filled with hate? What happened to this person that made their world view so distorted? What a terrible way to have to live...fueled always by hate. And then the hardest question of all-What have I done to contribute to this problem? How have I been blind to this? How has my silence on these issues allowed this person who is in the same race as me, or political party as me, or religion as me- to see the world in such a terrible and bleak way. Which leads me to the third thing we have to do.<br />
<br />
The final thing we have to do is start educating those around us. We have to start assertively acting out in positive ways. We can't just assume that since we know it's wrong to be racist that our children will just understand by osmosis that being racist is wrong. We have to start conversations with our children now. We have to explain what is happening in the world and why it's wrong. And what we can do to help. And what they can do to help. When they see something on t.v. or in a movie or in real life we need to pause and take time right then to talk about it with them. <br />
<br />
When we hear prejudiced comments or racist jokes we can stop the conversation. We can respectively tell people that we don't agree or we don't approve. Or ask them why they felt that joke was funny or why they felt the comment was prejudiced. I recently read a quote in an article about Charlottesville that said there is a big difference between those who laugh at racist jokes and those who run over people with their cars. And while there is a difference, we should at least acknowledge that they are rooted in the same incorrect and hate-filled thinking, and that the distance between the two actions are not as far as we might think.<br />
<br />
The members in the alt-right movement were not born hating others. They learned it bit by bit. The man who ran over people with his car didn't start out on the alt-right path with that in mind. First he felt pain. Then he decided to blame others for that pain. Then he felt anger and then he decided to run people over with his car. Some of it was probably learned from people explicitly telling him that the hate was good but some of it was also learned each time he told a joke or made a racist comment and no one listening told him it was wrong. We might not all be able to march in peace protests or create national movements to oppose white supremacy, but we can all speak up within our own circles of influence and call people out when they say something that is racist.<br />
<br />
The members of the alt-right don't live in a bubble. Sure some might live in the mountains on compounds but a lot of those marchers live among us. They are college students, one was even the president of his college's republican group, they are someone's kids or siblings or parents. And now they will go home to their families, schools, their communities, their church groups, etc. And that is where we must stand up. We have to tell them- that thinking doesn't have a place today. And when we see new people starting down that path we need to stop them in their tracks before they get to this place where the are marching around with nazi flags. <br />
<br />
Our influence starts with our family. If we're teachers our influence extends to our classroom. If we are church leaders it extends to our membership. We can use our influence to write blog posts, letters to the editor, emails to our government officials. We can invite our neighbors over more. We can join community groups. We can make an effort to break out of the thought bubbles that Facebook and our favorite news channel creates for us and start trying to see things from another perspective. We can take a look at the groups we associate with and see if what they are doing is helpful or hurtful. It's easy to correct someone in a different religion or political party when you disagree with them. It's a little harder when it's someone standing next to you in your own group. Do we have the courage to lovingly correct our political contemporaries when they've gone off track? Do we have the courage to lovingly correct our brothers and sisters at church when they've forgotten to have charity? <br />
<br />
And when we, ourselves, do something wrong or misspeak or have turned a blind eye and someone who loves us calls us on it, do we have the courage to apologize. We don't need to get defensive or push back or say things like "all lives matter". We can simply apologize. We can simply try better the next time. I do things wrong all the time. I say things wrong all the time. And people who love me correct me all the time. When I'm confident in that love and they are confident in my love then we can together work through differences and problems. That's why, in the listening and correcting of others, we can't be fueled by hate. It has to be love.<br />
<br />
We know that shaming others rarely leads to lasting change. Shaming people leads to a shallow temporary change of behavior at best and a hate filled, self-righteous rebellion at worst. Shame feeds the other's sense of rightness. Rationalizing their thoughts like "they shamed me because they do hate me, so I was right to hate them in the first place!" When we correct someone by trying to shame them it's usually out of us wanting them to know that they were wrong, wrong, WRONG! And while white supremacists are absolutely wrong, just telling them they are wrong doesn't give them any tools for changing their wrongness. When we correct someone out of love by trying to teach them we do more than just tell them what is wrong, we tell them what is right! We teach them what is right through our words and our actions. So after we have unequivocally told them this cannot continue and their thinking is completely wrong we have to then be an example of what is right by loving those around us and refusing to let their wrongness change how we are acting toward others.<br />
<br />
Now obviously once someone is bulldozing people down with their car the time for talk is past. When someone is burning down others property and holding up Nazi signs the time for sitting down and talking is past. That's why it's even more important that we are talking and helping long before we get to these points of crisis.<br />
<br />
And even when people are so far gone that they are willing to embrace hatred and white supremacy and all that it entails we don't give up on correcting them. We don't cry that these problems are too big or we aren't up to the challenge of fixing it. We just each keep doing our parts (big or small) to teach others what is right. To tell racists everywhere they've made a misjudgement. They've gone down a wrong road. We ask them to stop living their lives full of hatred and to join us in love. And the only way to show them they are on the wrong road is to show them where the right road is. We must over and over again declare racism and supremacy are wrong in all their forms! We must be vigilant in making sure there is not a place for racism in our families, in our communities, in our political parties, or in our religions. And the way we make sure there is no room is by filling each of those communities with love. <br />
<br />
All people everywhere have the responsibility to stop ignoring hate, speak out against hate, and then educate others about what is right. We can only do all of these through the path of love. Sometimes love means forgiving when we can, sometimes love means learning more about another person, sometimes love means admitting we have been wrong, sometimes love is listening to others, sometimes love is correcting someone who is wrong, sometimes love means sending people to jail when they've hurt others, sometimes love is using whatever influence you've been given to promote that love, sometimes love is meeting a new person, sometimes love is approaching a situation in a different way, and sometimes love means helping others find their voice too.<br />
<br />
It's easy to love those who love us. It's easy to hate those that hate us. Can we love those who hate us? Can we speak up and tell them they are not right? Can we help to show them what is right? That's the power of the bystander. Innocent no more, we realize it's time for us to choose. It's time for us to love. It's time for us to act!<br />
<br />
<br />Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-30522604016672288882017-08-14T05:00:00.000-07:002017-08-14T22:19:47.940-07:00Book Review: Women in Eternity, Women of Zion<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1052364.Women_in_Eternity_Women_of_Zion" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Women in Eternity, Women of Zion" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1389456049m/1052364.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1052364.Women_in_Eternity_Women_of_Zion">Women in Eternity, Women of Zion</a> by Alma Don Sorensen and Valerie Hudson Cassler<br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2085543613">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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While this is written in the form of a book review it is
really more of an essay about my personal beliefs about the treatment of women
in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day Saints, treatment of women in our
culture, and treatment of women throughout history. I self label myself as a Mormon
feminist.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know that some people reading
this post might be irked by the fact that I’m a Mormon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While others might be annoyed with the fact
that I’m a feminist.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is always the
possibility that I’m just an irksome annoying person in general. No matter how
you view my life choices I would love to hear your thoughts and comments about
these topics! So please post respectful ideas below…whether they be of the
agreeing or disagreeing persuasion…and lets start a conversation on this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’m on a journey out of pain right now and this book went a
long way toward helping ease some of the pain that I've begun to feel as a
woman in the church. I knew from page one this book would be of worth to me as
the author Valerie Cassler describes her own reason in writing it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had begun to feel pain as a woman in the
church and was concerned about the language and teachings we often read and
hear within church walls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some of the
popular interpretations of scriptures can be damaging to women such as did Paul
really mean women shouldn't talk in church, does Doctrine and Covenants really
mean that women can be given and taken from men like livestock, does the story
of Adam and Eve really mean that a wife must be subject to her husband for all
of eternity?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She finally comes to the
realization that this pain was given to her by God so that she would be
motivated to search out answers and share those answers with others by writing
this book.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This introduction also states
that she is no longer in pain about these things...I hope I might be able to
get to that point too.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
After having my fifth child I began to really question if I
was of any worth, if I was doing what God wanted me to do, and how God felt
about women. As I began to search the scriptures harder and attend the temple
more frequently I began to be overwhelmed by just how male centric the LDS and
really all Christian religions are.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
scriptures, church teachings, and even hymns seemed to be filled with phrases
like the eternal life of man, sons of men, kings and priests, God giveth to all
men liberally, if any man take a wife, faith of our fathers, brother’s keeper,
etc etc etc.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was looking for answers
about women's paths in this life and in the eternities and found myself quite
dejected about the fact that there isn't much information about women within
the written teachings of the church.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
know that current church leaders are quick to add "and women" to many
of the scriptures but sometimes it seems almost patronizing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I understand that the scriptures were written
mostly by men, about men, and for men, but surely with continuing revelation if
it was God's will to correct this oversight he could have right? And when the
church teaches us over and over again that women have unique divine-given
responsibilities and talents and callings in this life doesn't that mean that
we would also need unique instruction in this life?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if we need unique instructions about
our unique paths is it really enough to simply just tack on "and
women" to the scriptures that are meant for men?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I mean, if women are as important as men in the eternities
why do we know so little about our Heavenly Mother?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If women are moving toward being queens and
goddesses in the next life why aren't there depictions of Heavenly Mother being
involved in our creation or the world's creation?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If men can do that by themselves as depicted
in the temple or in the scriptures then why do we need women at all?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How can we believe that men are not punished
for Adam's transgression but women will be for Eve's? What scripture or
doctrine makes it so that only two women speak each conference amid a sea of
men? I understand that Men have priesthood authority but does that mean that
all but two speakers at conference should be male? Men don't have to have
babies or be wives to express their views about womanhood in the women's
general session so why would we assume that a woman can't speak in priesthood
session just because she doesn't have the priesthood?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If it's important for women to learn from men
why not vice versa?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Especially when the
family proclamation tells us that women's responsibilities are to teach and
nurture God's children- doesn't that include when children grow into adults? If
God created men and women to be equal partners in a marriage how can we explain
polygamy- how can a man and a woman become one flesh when a man has 20 wives to
attend to? If Heavenly Mother is an equal partner to our Heavenly Father why
don't we talk about her or know anything about her? If we have the doctrine of
Heavenly Mother why haven't we incorporated that into our scriptures or the
temple? Why do men become priests to God while women become priestesses unto
their husband only? If we are truly equal partners in marriage why do women
"give themselves in marriage" and the man just "takes a
wife" or "receives" her? How does a husband “preside” in a
marriage where both partners are supposed to be equal?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I don't list out these questions to make others doubt but
rather to paint a picture of the level of frustration I went into this book
with.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This book definitely attempts to
answer all of these questions and succeeds in answering many for me! While
you'll have to read the entire book to get answers to all of these questions
let me quickly summarize three main concepts of the book and add my thoughts.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
1) Adam and Eve </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The first part I really appreciated was the discussion about
Adam and Eve.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>First it breaks down the
actual order of events in which things happened (this order varies from account
to account in the scriptures and in the temple itself).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A quick summary of this is that as the Mother
of all living and the first to partake of the fruit- Eve (and women) become the
gate keeper for the veil leading into mortality.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Part of that assignment includes convincing
Adam (and man) to partake in this also.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Partaking of the fruit of the tree of knowledge helps us to know good
and evil.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It means partaking in the plan
of happiness, partaking in the raising of a family, and partaking in the acquiring
of knowledge.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After Adam partakes, God
then sets him (or man) up to be the gate keepers for the second veil leading
into the eternities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So men and women
are doing equal yet separate work necessary for salvation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Women bringing the sons and daughters of God
into the second estate while men (Christ through his atonement and the men he
has given keys in officiating) bring them into the third.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Furthermore, because Adam's eyes are not open
and he is not yet fully mortal (he won't know death until he eats) until Eve
gives him the fruit we can even see that Adam, in a way, is born of Eve.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thus making her the mother of ALL (including
Adam).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This idea also helps us better
understand why God then requires Eve to hearken unto Adam.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because Adam hearkened unto Eve in partaking
of the fruit and passing through the first veil, Eve is then asked to hearken
unto Adam by partaking of the fruit of the tree of life (Christ’s atonement)
and moving toward passing through the second veil.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
However, the book does acknowledge some of the misinterpretations
of this plan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One pitfall that can arise
is that because the first veil is already past for all living our focus is on
the second veil back to our Heavenly Father.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Because men are the keepers of this veil many people's focus is more on
men than on women and many begin to think that man's job is more important than
the woman's. They might even think that it is more important for only men to
speak or lead in any way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Another aspect of the creation story it discusses is the
"curse" of Eve.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They bring up
the points that God doesn't curse Eve but curses future experiences for her
sake. Just as he curses the ground for Adam's sake.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What does it mean to curse something for
their sake?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We know that after partaking
of the fruit they gain a knowledge of good and evil but that they also can now
understand that everything has it's opposites.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>In fact after they are cast out from the garden Eve even says that it's
good for them to know the bitter so that they might better know the sweet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In this context, when God multiplies Eve's
sorrow in child rearing it also means that he multiplies her capacity for
joy!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And in fact, I feel this idea
deeply as I consider my own experience as a woman and mother.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
2) Polygamy</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As I've discussed in my previous book reviews of books
dealing specifically with polygamy, this is a huge sticking spot for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Everything I believe and have been taught
about God's plan for marriage and women makes me revolt against the idea of
polygamy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And in fact the entire time I
read about the authors teachings of Adam and Eve I realized how God
fundamentally, from the beginning, sets up man and woman to be in a monogamous
relationship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All of what I learned
about men and women in this book seems to fall apart when placed inside a
polygamous relationship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I was glad
when they decided to address just that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Their explanations for this principle come mostly from
Doctrine and Covenant's section 132 and from there the story of Abraham.
Section 132 is pretty much a minefield for misinterpretations.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The wording and order of scriptures make it
hard to get at the root of what is being said.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Some of these misinterpretations have even made their way into church
manuals and general conference talks over the years (Brigham Young and Heber C.
Kimball have some whoppers!) causing even more pain and confusion on the
subject. The fact that it first talks about the New and Everlasting covenant
(marriage) and then talks about polygamy has led many members to believe that
the new and everlasting covenant is polygamy, when in fact they are two separate
topics.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Here are the two main misinterpretations of polygamy that I’ve
heard taught and the authors rebuttals for each:</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
a) That polygamy is the only acceptable form of marriage to
God.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Many early saints living polygamy
believed that monogamy was an evil invention of the Romans and perverted the
plan of God which was to live polygamy forever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This books rebuttal of this idea hinges on the fact that God asks
several times if Abraham and others would be condemned for living
polygamy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Asking this shows us that
polygamy contradicts the established law of monogamy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If polygamy was God's law on polygamy and
Abraham practiced that law why would there even be a question of whether what he
did was right or not?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is the very
pattern of an Abrahamic sacrifice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We
see it in the story of Abraham and Isaac and then again with Abraham and Hagar.
First God's sets up a law- For the Isaac story it's that "thou shalt not
kill" and for the Hagar story it's that a marriage is limited to one man
and one wife (monogamy).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then he asks
someone to sacrifice by breaking the law= for the Isaac story it's that Abraham
must murder Isaac and for the Hagar story it's that Abraham should take a
second wife.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Following this pattern we
can see that section 132 introduces first the law (monogamy) and then gives the
sacrificial exception (polygamy). However this was certainly not many early
church leaders’ interpretation of this passage and they often preached just the
opposite. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
b) Polygamy is the pattern of heaven and will be practiced
eternally. Many early saints also preached and believed that polygamy would
never again be taken from the earth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>However, it was taken from the earth and we now enjoy being able to
practice monogamy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This also brings up
the question: if the leadership was wrong about it never being retracted could
they also have been wrong about it ever being commanded?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The authors of this book maintain that it was
a principal given by God while the jury is still out for me on that one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I feel that polygamy might have a
misinterpretation of the sealing covenant by Joseph himself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Culturally at the time there were many other
churches starting out that were practicing “spiritual wifery”. I think as
Joseph learned more about sealings and combined that with his own ideas about
many wives he might have set out on a path that was never intended by God. However,
while the authors and I might disagree about the beginnings of polygamy we do
at least agree on its ending.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Following the pattern of the Abrahamic sacrifice we know
that the third part of the story is that God provides a way to deliver the
person out of the sacrifice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the
Isaac story he provides a lamb in the thicket so that Abraham and Isaac are
both saved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the story of Abraham and
Hagar God allows Hagar to leave and for the marriage to be ended.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He sees they are unhappy and he allows the
sacrifice to end.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He doesn't smite
Abraham or Hagar for parting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In fact he
blesses Hagar with many new blessings and guides her path away from polygamy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And in fact in Doctrine and Covenants 132:50 God
even tells Joseph he acknowledges his sacrifices and will provide a way for his
escape.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All of these examples show that
no matter the reason for polygamy being lived in this life it will not be lived
in the next.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That it is a temporary
principal (at most) and that it is considered a sacrifice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And while sacrifice brings forth blessings,
the blessing for the sacrifice cannot be a continuation of that sacrifice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In eternal life the time of sacrifice will be
ended.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Therefore, if polygamy is a
sacrifice, it cannot be required of us in eternity. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This knowledge eases much pain and worry for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One last quick note is that it also eases my
worry that the reason we don't talk more about Heavenly Mother is that we don't
know how many there are. There is no required polygamy in heaven, I have only
one Heavenly Mother, and that means we can begin to learn more about her!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
However, we do need to acknowledge that many temple
practices still reflect a much different understanding of this principal in
that we allow men but not women to be sealed to more than one person after a
divorce or after a spouse dies. We know that God will make all things right in
the end and I believe (as do the authors) that these practices will change in
the future as we seek out new knowledge.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It was somewhat discouraging though to read the authors' belief that
these changes would happen soon and then to realize the book was written 15
years ago and they still hadn't happened.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
3) The idea of Zion and Women's roles therein</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In the New Testament, Book of Mormon and early church
history we see that God's main purpose in calling a prophet is to establish
Zion among his people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What are some of
the attributes of Zion? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That the people
are of one heart, there is no poor among them, all are looked after and cared
for, and all participate in the administration of Zion equally.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Since Joseph Smith's interpretation of the law of
consecration was mostly focused on the temporal aspects such as food, wealth,
and possessions, we as latter day saints sometimes miss the bigger pictures of
the idea of Zion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When it says there
were no poor among them it doesn't just mean financially poor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It also mean physically poor, emotionally
poor, and even power (or authority) poor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It means that no one had more power or more right to happiness than
another. All genders, ages and races are as one and enjoy equal say in their
worship and equal time from the Lord. This book also clearly illustrates that
throughout history women have been made poor in many of these aspects.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It also discusses how within the LDS cultures
of today women might still be regarded as being poor.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
They point out that we know that Joseph’s Smith’s attempts
to institute the law of consecration ultimately didn’t result in a Zion
community.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’ve also been taught that
it was because the saints just weren’t ready.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We often equate this with not being ready to have all their possessions
in common.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But we need to consider other
ways in which the early saints were not yet becoming one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We know that many of the men during the
foundations of the church were called out to on multiple missions or spent much
of their time in the school of the prophets while women were left at home
(sometimes in another state or country) often raising their children in poverty
and watching their children die.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And
even then God chastens the saints and tells them they are not yet a Zion
people.<br />
<br />
While we honor these sacrifices, is it also possible that God was
telling them there was another way?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That
there were still poor among them because women were not being utilized yet?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were not allowed to participate in
temple ordinances or help with the administration of the church in any way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Furthermore, could it be that Joseph’s not
including women in the administration of the church and priesthood ordinances
had less to do with what God wanted and more to do with what culturally Joseph
had been raised to believe about women? And if so, could some of those things
change for women even today? Looking back on history now we can see that soon
the Relief Society was coming, soon the temple was opened to women, but for
many years women were still the poor among the early saints.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What changes are coming soon for the women of
the church today? That question and the desire to be among the saints when it’s
answered is something that keeps me coming back even on my hardest days as a self-proclaimed
Mormon feminist.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
The New Testament and Book of Mormon further illustrate what
is needed in Zion communities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sorenson
and Cassler do an amazing job of walking me through each story of a people from
beginning to end who accomplish or fail to accomplish Zion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They also give a detailed account of Paul’s
teaching on charity and how that too is a call to Zion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This alone is worth reading this book
for!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The big take away “aha” for me was
when they pointed out how many times the Book of Mormon authors use gender
relations as an indication for whether a group of people were righteous or
not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have descriptions of the wicked
abusing women, practicing polygamy and seeking out concubines, breaking their
wives hearts, raping women and even cannibalism.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We also have descriptions of the righteous
loving their wives, defending their families, and making sure that there are no
poor (women or men) among them. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
They also point out that many of the world's financially
impoverished are women.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Much of this is
the result of men not hearkening to Eve. What is meant by that?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Many men do not want to settle down into a
marriage anymore and as a result many women are also not wanting to settle down
into marriage and even when they do marriages are not seen as binding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because of this many children are born
outside of a truly committed relationship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>If a man was unsure about committing to a woman he is also unsure about
committing to offspring and in many cases this results in women caring for
children alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Furthermore, since women are often power poor too, meaning
that they have less representation in government, that means men are also
responsible for much of the allotting of money within societies. If they don't
see caring for children as a priority this mean less funds and programs are put
toward supporting these women in their efforts. Less maternity leave, less
child care, and less financial opportunities for women. Also, if women are put
in situations of having to choose between staying with Adam (man) and having
children, or having to choose between being able to have a viable career and
child rearing this leads to women not wanting the “burden” of children.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then we begin to see ideas like abortion
becoming more popular among women because it is seen as their only choice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thus when many people talk about
"women's choice" they are only talking about the choice to end a
pregnancy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And then more funding is put
into the choice against motherhood (abortion) and less funding and attention is
given to the choice for motherhood (maternity leave, adequate health care,
child care, etc) Not to get too political here but if we are unwilling to
support mother's in the care for their children, is it any wonder that some see
abortion as their only choice? </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The occurrences of domestic violence against women, rape,
and practices such as female circumcision and women's general lack of political
representation in many parts of the world are another evidence that women are
seen as power poor, emotionally lesser and physically<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>weak.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
After some discussion about the world’s treatment of women
(including an appendix in the end of the book) It then talks about what is the
church membership getting right when it comes to women rights and what can we
still be working on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The church leaders
are wonderful about advocating that men and women should be equal within a
marriage and that men should not command or be a dictator in the family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They are advocates for fidelity within
marriage including that we should not be involved with pornography (an industry
that is very oppressive to women and men who may or may not be willing
participants in making it). They have also been very clear about including
women in councils on the ward and stake level and recognizing that women have
talents and skills that are needed within the leadership of each group.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They have also been advocates for women
obtaining an education and growing their depth of knowledge.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
However, there is also, of course, further work that needs
to be done.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just because the leadership
have told us to include women in the council doesn’t mean that everyone is
doing it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And even if they include the
women are they giving them an equal voice? Does their voice have as much weight
as the high priest group leader?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are
their opinions listened to?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if it is
important at the family and ward levels for women to be involved in the
preaching and teaching and administering why would it be any different at the
church-wide levels? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why are there only
two female speakers during the general sessions of conference? These are all
areas that we as a membership must work together to make sure that there are no
“poor” among us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The proclamation to the
family makes it clear that men and women have different divine attributes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If both are equally important within a family
group they must be equally important within a church group. Men and women together
can see a wider picture and move us toward a more Zion like state of being.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Also, even though we’ve been taught that men and women are equals
within a marriage- and while marriages today are progressing forward- I think
there are still some teachings and practices that don’t quite seem to echo that
belief.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I mentioned previously, even
though polygamy is no longer physically practiced the reason for and duration
of polygamy within the early church is something that needs to be addressed to
put some of these worrisome beliefs and ideals about male/female relationships
to rest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Also, I think we could stand to
have some further clarification about how both spouses are equal but the
husband still presides.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The book does
address this and they do a good job but I still need more guidance to understand
this.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Also, we need to look at the amount of time that is required
of men to be in church meetings (and thus the amount of time the woman is
required to be at home raising the family by herself).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not that men shouldn’t be doing good things
and serving in the church and not that women can’t do an amazing job of raising
children but are we supporting men and women in the same ways.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If she has a calling that demands her time is
her husband picking up the slack at home or is she expected to be super woman?
Do we see women’s meetings as important as men’s meetings? And more
importantly, are we making sure that both men and women are having adequate
time to focus on their own spirituality and be edified.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In my own stake I’ve seen many times that the
stake priesthood meeting is held on Sunday nights so that all men can attend
and nothing is scheduled over it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But
the women’s meeting is always on Saturday mornings and has often been scheduled
over with ward baptisms or other events that make it hard for women to
attend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are the meetings given equal
weight of importance? Also, are we training the women in important and
spiritual matters?</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Similarly, while many men are happy to take the baby to
Elder’s quorum or to a presidency meeting some are not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can remember early on in my own marriage when
my husband and I were both 1<sup>st</sup> counselors in our respective
presidencies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I took our two oldest
children with me to every meeting but one night I was helping someone with
something and I couldn’t bring the girls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>When I asked if he could take them to his presidency meeting he replied
he didn’t know if it would be appropriate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My husband is a very thoughtful and enlightened man and realized as soon
as he said it that he had, without realizing it, always had a double standard
about child care.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If both meetings are
equally important- then it would either be equally appropriate or equally
inappropriate for us to take our children.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
I mentioned previously that the leaders of the church have
advocating for women to gain an education.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But that has usually been followed up with “so that she has a way to
support herself if she has to sometime”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I recently read an amazing BYU devotional given by Eva Whitman that explained
there is value in educating women beyond just making sure they can work if they
have to. It’s important to gain knowledge always to improve our lives and
minds. And it’s okay for women to want to receive education and to want to
work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We don’t have to wait until we “need”
to work because of financial reasons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And furthermore we need to be better about not criticizing the timing or
choices of other women getting their education, working or staying home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I loved the concept of avoiding “friendly
fire”.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Another improvement we can make as members is to avoid misusing
or interchanging words inappropriately.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Instead of saying church leadership- we may say “brethren” forgetting
that there are also women involved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Instead of saying priesthood holders we may say “the priesthood”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Men are not the priesthood they hold keys in
administering the priesthood. The priesthood is the power of God on Earth and
is available to and given for the blessing of all people of the earth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
On the topic of the priesthood the book does a good job of
going over women and how they relate to priesthood.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It does acknowledge that it’s clear we do not
fully understand all the facets of the priesthood.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The fact that women used to give blessing and
annointings (for example the woman who anoints Christ before his crucifixion,
the women who are going to prepare His body afterward, and the early saints who
performed an anointing ordinance for other women in preparation for child
birth) is a reason to believe that the priesthood and it’s use can be given to
different people at different times.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
book is careful to say, and I will be too, that I’m not advocating that women
be ordained in the priesthood exactly as men are now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know we are different and will approach it
in different ways.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But the book does say
that we as a membership can be doing a better job in discussing the ways that
women do interact with the divine- whether it be through the priesthood itself,
motherhood, or some yet to be revealed form of priestesshood.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We know that women cannot conceive or bring
children through the first veil without a man. And we know that a man cannot
pass into eternal life without the woman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Neither is the woman without the man, nor the man without the woman, in
the Lord”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So there has to be a reason
that women are needed within the priesthood ordinances.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I don’t, nor do the authors of this book,
believe that it is just to be eternal wombs to grow new spirits in the eternities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is definitely a connection between the
powers of God and women that we are yet to fully comprehend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><br />
<br />
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">We should also be discussing Women's roles in eternity more. In my stake on mother's day nothing was posted at all about women on their facebook page but on father's day there was an article posted about how fatherhood prepares men to become like God. Maybe they didn't post a similar article on mother's because one has never been written but that is exactly my point. We talk all the time about how we are here to become like God but we see God as a Father and a Priesthood holder. Two things I am not. So how do I, as a woman, become like God? This probably means we need to talk about Heavenly Mother more and also womanhood in general. How does being a mother prepare us to become like God? I believe that it does, I just wish that it was talked about more. We've heard quotes at church that being a mother is the most important job, that as a mother we have been given divine power to accomplish raising a family, that it's a noble and respected position. But we need to go further...why is it an important job? What divine strengths are we given? If we don't even talk about mother's on mother's day in my ward and then have the stake president come to speak about fathers on father's day it's hard to feel respected. Don't get me wrong, the father's day talks were wonderful and we should talk about fathers! I just wish that mother's day could have talked about womanhood, motherhood, or sisters.</span><br />
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span>
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">So that it doesn't feel like I'm throwing people under the bus there is also a lot of good that goes on in the stake and ward that I'm a part of. People taking care of one another and trying their hardest to be of one heart. I know a lot of men and women who have taught me so many important and wonderful things about being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ. I know that there are always so many needs to address and people to help that sometimes things just get forgotten here and there. I'm grateful for those who have helped me on this journey for the last year also. So many people who encourage and answer questions!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Well, these are my 8 pages of thoughts about this book and
many things outside of this book that I’ve contemplated in my own life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would strongly recommend this to any of my
friends who are seeking more understanding about what God thinks of women and
what we as women can accomplish.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
already moving on to more books about these topics and am always on the lookout
for new and exciting articles pertaining to them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll be discussing some other interesting
articles I’ve read through BYU studies and would love it if others have a
recommendation for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While I can only
approach this topic from an LDS woman’s perspective I know that some of these
pitfalls in gender relations happen within many organized religions and I’m interested
in how that effects members of those communities too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know that Heavenly Mother and Heavenly
Father love their children.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All of their
children.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That if we can use our
differences together we can accomplish more good, see a clearer picture of God,
and move toward being a Zion people.</div>
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/list/403325-julia">View all my reviews</a>
Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-55749169580979207372017-08-12T22:24:00.001-07:002017-08-12T22:26:09.502-07:00If Happiness Was a Daffodil (Poem)In an effort to organize and collect all the poems I've written throughout the years I've decided to share them here. Most of my poems come a little at a time and sometimes I think they are never done- growing and changing for years. Sometimes it easy to share our talents into adulthood when it's beautiful paintings or musical abilities. When I was younger I shared my writings often and easily in contests, public readings and classroom settings but now those opportunities are few and far between so bear with me since I'm a little rusty. I thought I'd start with some poems from my youth since that seems to be getting further and further away ;)<br />
<br />
If Happiness Was A Daffodil<br />
by Julia Baker (2002)<br />
<br />
If happiness was a daffodil<br />
and all the world a sky,<br />
so small might seem the joyous moments-<br />
in wind briefly pass by.<br />
<br />
Tossed back and forth.<br />
Stomped to the Earth<br />
under storms of snow and feet.<br />
So may our soul depleted feel until our spring we meet.<br />
<br />
To bring to us our life renewed,<br />
and of God teach through words of kind.<br />
To fill our path with memories<br />
planting daffodils in our mind.<br />
<br />
But just as spring rotates the earth<br />
joy is called to other places.<br />
And I know those children need you too<br />
to teach them of God's graces.<br />
<br />
How I need you, how I search for you.<br />
Sometimes elusive I feel that you are.<br />
But you're a friend to me in spite of that-<br />
for, like spring, your return isn't far.<br />
<br />
And upon each winter's completion<br />
you've planted me in nectar's eye.<br />
With each sorrow passed I more clearly know<br />
the daffodils in which I lie.Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-12512410902487307672017-08-12T19:05:00.001-07:002017-08-12T19:05:12.652-07:00Seeking the Influence of the Spirit<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="Table Grid"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="41" Name="Plain Table 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="42" Name="Plain Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="43" Name="Plain Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="44" Name="Plain Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="45" Name="Plain Table 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="40" Name="Grid Table Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
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<![endif]--><b>The following is a talk that I gave in church this July (2017). I usually don't write out full talks like this but since I did this time I thought I'd share it here. For more good reading check out some of the linked sources at the bottom as well!</b><br />
<b> </b>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">It is no
surprise to many of you that this last year has been a bumpy one for me.<span> </span>Full of moves, and changes, and a new baby,
and depression, and growth.<span> </span>My
relationship with my Heavenly Parents and with the Spirit has been challenged,
and stretched, and I found myself very emotional as I tried to write down in
words the experiences and feelings of despair and deliverance that have been so
prevalent over the last few months.<span> </span></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">I’m
usually a pretty off the cuff speaker.<span> </span>I
would usually show up with a few bullet points and a handful of quotes but
given the emotions I feel on this topic I’ve opted to write this talk out in its
entirety.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">In Enos he
tells us of his wrestle before God.<span> </span>We
can learn about this experience in the Book of Mormon institute manual. It
reads: “Enos did not wrestle <span class="Emphasis1">with</span> God. The record
states that Enos wrestled <span class="Emphasis1">before</span> God in prayer.
Such wrestling is the struggle to find and express one’s real desires under the
inspiration of the <a href="https://www.lds.org/topics/holy-ghost?lang=eng"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">Holy Ghost</span></a>.
Praying in this manner requires that a person eliminate vain, trite, or
insincere repetitions and to pour the deepest desires of his or her heart into
words. Each phrase becomes an expression of yearning and desire to do God’s
will. Such prayers are assisted and guided by the Holy Spirit, “for we know not
what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession
for us with groanings which cannot be uttered” (<a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/rom/8.26?lang=eng#25" target="_blank">Romans 8:26</a>).<span> </span></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">This last
year for me has been a wrestle before God.<span>
</span>I have struggled to figure out what I want, need and what to ask Him for.<span> </span>I’ve struggled at times to see the blessings
and talents given to me.<span> </span>I’ve struggled
to feel the influence of the Holy Ghost.<span>
</span>I’ve struggled to let go of vanity and of my own limiting judgements.
But through all of these struggles I have been assisted by the Spirit and have
been shown many tender mercies.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">How many
of you have felt this wrestle?<span> </span>A desire
to change might be met with the daily demands that keep us stuck in a
routine.<span> </span>A desire to learn might be met
with a physical exhaustion that closes down our minds.<span> </span>Sometimes it may even seem the harder we work
the less we harvest.<span> </span>We work extra hard
to get our family to church for some spiritual nourishment and then spend all
of sacrament meeting in and out with children. <span> </span>We spend extra time on our calling assignments
only to receive an email from someone who is frustrated with us and thinks we
are doing it all completely wrong. Maybe we spend extra time in the scriptures
in search of an answer only to be left with 5 new unanswered questions.<span> </span></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">And so we
come tired and broken to the feet of our Heavenly Parents in prayer.<span> </span>And maybe some struggle to be honest with
themselves about what they need to change. And maybe some struggle to be able
to articulate the desires of their heart.<span>
</span>And maybe some are held back by feelings of shame. And maybe some are
struggling to believe that Heavenly Father is even there. And this is when the
Spirit can enter and make an intercession for us with the Father.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">He not
only helps Heavenly Father communicate with us, he helps us communicate with
Heavenly Father.<span> </span>The feelings he brings
to us may be feelings of comfort, remembrance or inspiration.<span> </span>These feelings help us to pray more fervently
and directly and they also help us to receive answers.<span> </span>This is called revelation.<span> </span>Although the Spirit will do this for each of
us it is important to recognize that it will be done differently for each
person- not because the Spirit is different but because we are.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">It is true
that some instructions will be the same for all but the implementation will
vary.<span> </span>We should all seek the Spirit through
prayer but it will be a different prayer for each person.<span> </span>The place we pray, the time we pray, the
content and duration of our prayers will be different.<span> </span>Some will add meditation.<span> </span>Some will ponder in a quiet room and some
will ponder on their daily run.<span> </span>Some
will commune with God in nature. Some prayers will involve words while others
seem to be unspeakable prayers directly from the feelings of our heart.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">We can all
seek the Spirit through scripture study. But again the time of day, duration of
study, subject matter, highlighter color preference, etc. will be different for
each person. Some will read it all at once. Some will read a little throughout
the day. Some will listen to scriptures on cd in their car. Some will add
conference talks. Some will add historical references and biographies.<span> </span>Some will memorize the scriptures while
others will focus more on the overall impressions they receive.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">It’s
important that we don’t judge or criticize these differences just because
someone does something differently than you do. <span> </span>We don’t need to compare our effort to other’s
efforts. <span> </span>We should refrain from giving
overly specific advice about exactly how long something should be done for, or
what time of day it must be accomplished.<span>
</span>I love to hear examples and get ideas of what has worked for other
people but I know that not all ideas will work for me or my family.<span> </span>So I take what I need and leave the
rest.<span> </span>And we need to make sure that we
give other people opportunities to do the same when we offer them advice. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">One last
caution would be to refrain from always giving people the same answers of just
pray more or read your scriptures more.<span> </span>We
should not assume that trials only come to those who don’t seek the influence
of the Spirit. There are some trials such as physical or mental health or even
spiritual struggles that will need other interventions.<span> </span>Don’t assume that because someone is
depressed they aren’t praying to be happy. There isn’t a level of righteousness
that makes us immune to health challenges- that’s like Tom Cruise scientology
stuff, that’s not us. Don’t tell someone with a wayward child that they should
have read the scriptures with them more or held stricter family home evenings.
My sister recently pointed out that there is no level of righteousness we can
attain as parents that will take away our children’s agency. After all, God
himself watched as a third part of his own children fell away. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">We might
sometimes be surprised to find that those with questions and concerns and
trials are already the ones who are attending the temple most, reading their
scriptures most frequently or praying most fervently for answers and relief. It
is often in these times of struggle that we can learn the most from the
influence of the Spirit.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>We seek the Spirit and feel his
influence differently depending on our Spiritual gifts. 1 Corinthians chapter
12 states:</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number">1 </span>Now concerning spiritual <span class="clarity-word">gifts,</span> brethren, I would not have you ignorant. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number">4 </span>Now there are diversities of gifts,
but the same Spirit.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number">5 </span>And there are differences of
administrations, but the same Lord.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number">6 </span>And there are diversities of
operations, but it is the same God which worketh all in all.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number">7 </span>But the manifestation of the Spirit
is given to every man to profit withal.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number">8 </span>For to one is given by the Spirit
the word of wisdom; to another the word of knowledge by the same Spirit;</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number">9 </span>To another faith by the same
Spirit; to another the gifts of healing by the same Spirit;</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number">10 </span>To another the working of miracles;
to another prophecy; to another discerning of spirits; to another <span class="clarity-word">divers</span> kinds of tongues; to another the
interpretation of tongues:</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number">11 </span>But all these worketh that one and
the selfsame Spirit, dividing to every man severally as he will.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>As we study out what our
spiritual gifts are we will find more meaningful ways of seeking and receiving
from the Spirit.<span> </span>We may even find that
we are already feeling his influence in surprising ways.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>Elder Dallin H. Oaks gave a BYU
devotional entitled “Eight Ways God can Speak to You”.<span> </span>Another title could be- Eight Ways the Spirit
can influence you through Revelation.<span> </span>I
will just quickly name his ideas and give a quick summary of the implementation
of those Revelations. As you listen to the list contemplate examples of how you
may have already felt this influence in your own life.</span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span><span>1)<span style="font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-synthesis: weight style; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><span>The testimony or witness of the Holy Ghost that Jesus
is the Christ. </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span><span>2)<span style="font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-synthesis: weight style; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><span>Prophecy or speaking under the influence of the Holy
Ghost (This can come through the Prophet for the whole church, our leaders for
our local communities, and through us for ourselves and those for whom we are
responsible)</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span><span>3)<span style="font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-synthesis: weight style; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><span>Comfort (peace as we make decisions)</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span><span>4)<span style="font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-synthesis: weight style; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><span>Uplift (from feelings of depression, foreboding or
inadequacy)</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span><span>5)<span style="font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-synthesis: weight style; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><span>Inform (This could be inspiration for a talk, or
lesson, or knowing what to say to others)</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span><span>6)<span style="font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-synthesis: weight style; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><span>Restraint (This keeps us from doing something we
shouldn’t.<span> </span>Sometimes we might know why
we shouldn’t do it and in other cases we might not know.)</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span><span>7)<span style="font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-synthesis: weight style; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><span>Confirm (Neal A Maxwell said that Revelation is
usually received to an already informed mind. Doctrine and Covenants reminds us
to study things out in our mind and then ask if it be right)</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span><span>8)<span style="font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-synthesis: weight style; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><span>Impels (This is different from restraint or confirmation
because in those cases revelation is being sought.<span> </span>This is when the Revelation comes unprovoked
to push us to action. Instances we’ve heard about might be to call someone
immediately or check on a child who is then found to be in imminent danger)</span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>As I thought about examples in my
own life I was able to reflect upon when the Spirit has born testimony of my
Savior as I’ve attended the temple.<span> </span>The
supreme joy that I felt at these times helps me when I begin to doubt or
complain.<span> </span>I can touch back to those
times and hold on a little stronger. Perhaps that is why I love the words in <i>Come Thou Fount</i> of every blessing that
reads:</span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">“O to
grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be!<br />
Let thy goodness like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee<br />
Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">Here's
my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above”<span> </span></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>This has often been my prayer
when my wandering heart feels all out of patience for the answers to come or
inspiration to flow.</span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>Many of the examples that came to
my mind were of restraint. Probably because I love doing things that I know I
shouldn’t. I have heard that softly whispered word- “Patience” in my mind so
often I cannot count the experiences.<span>
</span>This restraint has saved me many times from speaking unkind words,
giving up on myself, or even walking away from church. </span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>I’ve had experiences of comfort
as I’ve decided what to study, who to marry, and when it was time to have
another child.</span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>I’ve had experiences of being
uplifted when I was dealing with physical and mental health trials.</span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>I’ve had instances where I’ve
been impelled to call to see if someone was okay, or to stay away from a
situation, or to check on my children.<span> </span>A
few of these instances have resulted in miraculous accounts but many more have
resulted in me checking on a peacefully sleeping baby who is, in fact, not in
danger or calling friend and having a lovely conversation but never knowing why
I felt so strongly to call.</span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>I’ve also been informed by the Spirit
when I’ve given talks and taught lessons. I would quickly like to describe in a
little more detail a recent example of when the Spirit informed me where to
look for an answer and what to say to my daughters.<span> </span>After church on Mother’s Day my daughters
were concerned that we didn’t talk about motherhood at church during Sacrament.
One of my daughters asked why we never talked about Heavenly Mother.<span> </span>I first answered with my own reasoning but
became self-conscience that I was maybe being too “Mormon feminist” with my
answer so I tried to temper it by repeating an old explanation someone had
given me as a youth. That answer was that God wanted to keep her reputation
sacred and so he doesn’t want us to talk about her as much.<span> </span>I was promptly informed by the Spirit that I
had misspoken and that this was absolutely not true.<span> </span> </span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>That night after the kids went to bed I asked
Alex if he and I could research a little bit about Heavenly Mother.<span> </span>We were led to an LDS gospel topics page
about her.<span> </span>From there we were led to
several resources that confirmed that there is in fact no doctrine about a
“sacred silence” in regard to our Heavenly Mother.<span> </span>In addition we also found a BYU study that
compiled everything that has ever been said by general authorities about Her. I
realized that the Spirit’s influence had not only informed me how to answer my
daughter’s question, it also answered many unspoken questions I had about my
own divine nature.<span> </span>The next morning I
was able to correct my answer to my children and now enjoy being able to freely
talk and testify about my Heavenly Mother and Her desire for my daughters, and
all of Her daughters, to become like her.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>The last element of Spiritual influence
that I want to talk about today is strength in numbers. A lot of us have
probably seen the visual demonstration where the speaker snaps one toothpick in
half easily but when you take a stack of 30 or 40 toothpicks they become
stronger.<span> </span>This is usually done to
illustrate unity but I would like to talk about how that unity can lead to a
stronger influence of the Spirit.</span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>If we turn back to 1 Corinthians 12
and continue reading about spiritual gifts we learn why we are each given
different gifts.<span> </span>It reads: </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">12
For as the body is one, and hath many members, and all the members of that one
body, being many, are one body: so also <span class="clarity-word">is</span>
Christ.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number"><span style="color: black;">13
</span></span><span style="color: black;">For by one Spirit are we all baptized into one </span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/12.1?lang=eng#note13a"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">body</span></a><span style="color: black;">,
whether <span class="clarity-word">we be</span> Jews or </span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/12.1?lang=eng#note13b"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">Gentiles</span></a><span style="color: black;">,
whether <span class="clarity-word">we be</span> </span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/12.1?lang=eng#note13c"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">bond</span></a><span style="color: black;">
or free; and have been all made to drink into one Spirit.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number">14 </span>For the body is not one member, but
many.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-indent: 0.5in;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>And a few chapters later in 1 Corinthians
14 it adds<span style="color: black;">: </span></span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number"><span style="color: black;">1 </span></span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/14.12?lang=eng#note1a"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">Follow</span></a><span style="color: black;"> after charity, and desire spiritual </span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/14.12?lang=eng#note1b"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">gifts</span></a><span class="clarity-word"><span style="color: black;">,</span></span><span style="color: black;"> but rather that ye
may prophesy…<span class="verse-number">12 </span>Even so ye, </span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/14.12?lang=eng#note12a"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">forasmuch as</span></a><span style="color: black;"> ye are zealous of spiritual </span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/14.12?lang=eng#note12b"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">gifts</span></a><span class="clarity-word"><span style="color: black;">,</span></span><span style="color: black;"> seek that ye may
excel to the </span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/14.12?lang=eng#note12c"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">edifying</span></a><span style="color: black;"> of the church.</span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>So what does this mean?<span> </span>We are given spiritual gifts first to help
ourselves seek and receive the Spirit.<span>
</span>But as we progress we are also given the influence of the Spirit in
order to build up the kingdom and to edify the church! When we collaborate as
men and women within a family, ward, stake and community we are able to
increase that influence.<span> </span>We learn in the
temple that as we begin to become of one heart and one prayer that the Spirit
can be more fully present and unrestrained. </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>In the book of Joel, speaking of
our day it says: </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number"><span style="color: black;">28
</span></span>And it shall
come to pass afterward, <span class="clarity-word"><span style="color: black;">that</span></span> I will <a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/ot/joel/2.28-29?lang=eng#note28a"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">pour out</span></a> my <a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/ot/joel/2.28-29?lang=eng#note28b"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">spirit</span></a> upon all flesh; and your sons and
your daughters shall <a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/ot/joel/2.28-29?lang=eng#note28c"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">prophesy</span></a>, your <a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/ot/joel/2.28-29?lang=eng#note28d"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">old</span></a> men shall <a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/ot/joel/2.28-29?lang=eng#note28e"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">dream</span></a> dreams, your young men shall see <a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/ot/joel/2.28-29?lang=eng#note28f"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">visions</span></a>:</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number"><span style="color: black;">29
</span></span>And also upon
the servants and upon the handmaids in those days will I pour out my spirit.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>We need each person to come and
bring with them what they can.<span> </span>As we
welcome people from different genders, ages, walks of life, and geographical
areas we increase the spiritual gifts in our ward and we increase the spiritual
influence that can be felt here.<span> </span>When we
refrain from criticizing, judging, and gossiping we invite the Spirit to be
here. When we praise, compliment, and give all members the opportunities to
serve and preach we invite the Spirit to be here.<span> </span>Linda K. Burton reminds us to ask “What if their
story were my story?” We need everyone’s stories to be shared. Elder Holland
told us we need all voices in the choir. As we become one body we become one
with our Savior.<span> </span>We become like Christ. And
that is the ultimate purpose to seek the Spirit’s influence in our life…to
become like our Savior and return to our Heavenly Parents.</span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>And what is it called when we
don’t judge?<span> </span>And we aren’t puffed up.
And we seeketh the Spirit instead of our own? Charity! Back to 1 Corinthians
chapter 13, it reads: </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number"><span style="color: black;">1 </span></span><span style="color: black;">Though
I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not </span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/13.2?lang=eng#note1a"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">charity</span></a><span style="color: black;">,
I am become <span class="clarity-word">as</span> sounding brass, or a tinkling
cymbal.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number"><span style="color: black;">2 </span></span><span style="color: black;">And
though I have <span class="clarity-word">the gift of</span> </span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/13.2?lang=eng#note2a"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">prophecy</span></a><span style="color: black;">,
and understand all </span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/13.2?lang=eng#note2b"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">mysteries</span></a><span style="color: black;">,
and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove
mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number"><span style="color: black;">3 </span></span><span style="color: black;">And
though I bestow all my goods to feed <span class="clarity-word">the </span></span><a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/1-cor/13.2?lang=eng#note3a"><span style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">poor</span></a><span class="clarity-word"><span style="color: black;">,</span></span><span style="color: black;"> and though I give my body to be burned, and
have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number"><span style="color: black;">9 </span></span><span style="color: black;">For
we know in part, and we prophesy in part.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span class="verse-number"><span style="color: black;">10
</span></span><span style="color: black;">But when that which is perfect is come, then that which
is in part shall be done away.</span></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-indent: 0.5in;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>When we seek the influence of the
Spirit the result is charity.<span> </span>Let us
take what we each individually know and what we each individually prophesy and
add to it a collective charity so that we might be perfected in Christ. Let’s
be patient with ourselves and with one another as we each publicly or privately
wrestle before God.<span> </span></span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>We can feel the influence of the
Spirit as we believe Christ when he says that we are His and will not be lost.<span> </span>We feel the influence of the Spirit when we believe
and preach that we are sons and daughters of Heavenly Parents to all of our
friends and families. We feel the Spirit when we have faith and hope that our
futures are in God’s hands. When we have patience in his timing. When we persevere
even when his influence cannot immediately be felt. When we ask questions, answer
questions, or help those who have lost sight of the path by loving them instead
of condemning them. We can feel the influence of the Spirit when we gain
knowledge and inform our minds. This means learning all we can from every good
source we can.<span> </span>Don’t resist listening to
someone just because they are older or younger than you, or a woman, or a
stranger, or belong to another faith.<span>
</span>Stay close to the Spirit so that you might be uplifted by the Spirit as
it is made manifest in each person around you. As we do these things Christ
will be in our homes, and our ward, and in our community and in our hearts.</span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
</span></span><div class="verse">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span>I have a testimony that our
Heavenly Father loves His children.<span> </span>That
our Heavenly Mother loves Her children.<span>
</span>That the Spirit is their gift to us. We are told in our confirmation
ordinance “Receive the Holy Ghost”.<span>
</span>Reach out, accept this divine present, receive the Holy Ghost. The
constant companionship of the Holy Ghost gives us the power to become priests and
priestesses and to be the instruments our Heavenly Parents use to distribute
that spiritual influence to the entirety of the world. </span></span></span></div>
<div class="verse">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;">I have a testimony that as we seek the influence
of the Spirit and have charity we can be saved from the destructive forces that
would divide us, weaken us and condemn us.<span>
</span>I love this gospel and I love the Holy Spirit that has saved me from
myself more times than I can count. For this I am eternally grateful and say
these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<b><span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">Sources and Inspiration:</span></span></span></b><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">Here is the <a data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?hl=en&q=http://lds.org&source=gmail&ust=1502676199743000&usg=AFQjCNFCe9SkcjGf6kIpVTcFlYqYCSXjCQ" href="http://lds.org/" target="_blank">lds.org</a> gospel topics essay on Heavenly Mother:<br /><a data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?hl=en&q=https://www.lds.org/topics/mother-in-heaven?lang%3Deng&source=gmail&ust=1502676199743000&usg=AFQjCNHdbp8AeV7iBUNAyepdVe_q2nHS7g" href="https://www.lds.org/topics/mother-in-heaven?lang=eng" target="_blank">https://www.lds.org/topics/<wbr></wbr>mother-in-heaven?lang=eng</a><br /><br />From there I followed one of the links to the BYU study "A Mother There"<br /><a data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?hl=en&q=https://byustudies.byu.edu/content/mother-there-survey-historical-teachings-about-mother-heaven&source=gmail&ust=1502676199743000&usg=AFQjCNFw9nUbomq778mpQ5ncNEoUL5SMYw" href="https://byustudies.byu.edu/content/mother-there-survey-historical-teachings-about-mother-heaven" target="_blank">https://byustudies.byu.edu/<wbr></wbr>content/mother-there-survey-<wbr></wbr>historical-teachings-about-<wbr></wbr>mother-heaven</a><br /><br />I also used some of the scriptures from this BYU devotional talk:<br /><a data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?hl=en&q=https://speeches.byu.edu/talks/eva-witesman_women-education-future-god-see/&source=gmail&ust=1502676199743000&usg=AFQjCNFinP6Ai_64AFtdeCUOtDzUwm8mNg" href="https://speeches.byu.edu/talks/eva-witesman_women-education-future-god-see/" target="_blank">https://speeches.byu.edu/<wbr></wbr>talks/eva-witesman_women-<wbr></wbr>education-future-god-see/</a><br /><br />And a devotional talk from Elder Oaks:<br /><a data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?hl=en&q=https://www.lds.org/new-era/2004/09/eight-ways-god-can-speak-to-you?lang%3Deng%26_r%3D1&source=gmail&ust=1502676199743000&usg=AFQjCNGiC5xKo_qquGxHM6gVGX_Cb9XU1g" href="https://www.lds.org/new-era/2004/09/eight-ways-god-can-speak-to-you?lang=eng&_r=1" target="_blank">https://www.lds.org/new-era/<wbr></wbr>2004/09/eight-ways-god-can-<wbr></wbr>speak-to-you?lang=eng&_r=1</a></span></span><br style="mso-special-character: line-break;" />
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</span>Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-46628769798312707412017-08-06T21:57:00.003-07:002017-08-06T21:57:50.091-07:00Book Review- The Ghost of Eternal Polygamy: Haunting the Hearts and Heaven of Mormon Women and Men by Carol Lynn Pearson<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/31126975-the-ghost-of-eternal-polygamy" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="The Ghost of Eternal Polygamy: Haunting the Hearts and Heaven of Mormon Women and Men" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1468588928m/31126975.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/31126975-the-ghost-of-eternal-polygamy">The Ghost of Eternal Polygamy: Haunting the Hearts and Heaven of Mormon Women and Men</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/9682.Carol_Lynn_Pearson">Carol Lynn Pearson</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2063710230">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
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I love Carolyn Pearson. The first book I picked up of hers was a small fable for our times called The Lesson. At the time I had no idea who she was, what else she'd written or her story. I was so naive to so much of Mormon culture and famous people when I went to BYU! Now of course, I've read so many things by her and about her. She feels like a wonderful example of what a woman in the church can be. She talks about herself being a "tribe elder" and I would totally agree. She talks about being part of the churches trek from "patriarchy" to "partnership" and I say "AMEN"!<br />
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Her writing style is so wonderful. Whether she's writing poetry, or short fables, or about heavy subject matter like this book- her words just flow on and off the page effortlessly. Instead of just presenting us with historical facts she's able to take us there so that we can see and feel the words, discussions, heartbreak, etc. <br />
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In this book she discusses the history of polygamy, the doctrines and culture behind section 132, current temple practices, and more. A quick summary being that while we excommunicate members for practicing polygamy we haven't excommunicated the idea of polygamy from among our members. That while we don't practice it here on earth, temple practices and historical church teachings seem to threaten that polygamy still awaits all of us in the eternities. <br />
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In between each chapter of her own research and thoughts she has chapters of quotes from men and women within the LDS culture telling their own stories. Stories of men who are sealed to multiple women (through divorce or outliving their spouse). Stories of women widowed young who then have children with a second husband and have to figure out if they should break their sealing to the first husband so their children can be sealed to their dad (her second husband). Stories of daughters whose fathers made terrible jokes about wanting other wives beyond their mothers. Stories of men who felt they didn't need to put as much effort into their marriages now because in the eternities they could have new and better wives. Women who fear putting their whole selves into a marriage because they don't want to love their husband too much if they have to share him in heaven. And on and on. <br />
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I read this book shortly after finishing In Sacred Loneliness by Todd Compton which talked about the history of polygamy and the women who lived it. I felt like as I read that book I had this inner dialogue with myself- feelings of betrayal at not knowing the full history and also fear that what I believed about heaven and marriage was somehow wrong. Fear that polygamy would someday or somewhere be reinstated. And finally coming to the conclusion that eternal polygamy was wrong. Reading The Ghost of Eternal Polygamy afterward was so validating! It discussed and alleviated so many worries. And also, it helped me know that I wasn't alone in my study and deep thought about this subject.<br />
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Carolyn describes beautifully about her testimony being shattered into a million pieces during her own divorce. And that when she was finally ready to pick up the pieces she took each one carefully in her hands and decided which to keep and which to let go. She decides ultimately to let the piece of eternal polygamy go. She knows that God loves her. She knows that heaven with plural marriage sounds more like hell and so she chooses to believe that heaven will not include plural marriage. And I'm happy to agree with her there! <br />
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I love that even with this opinion on polygamy she is very gracious and respectful toward Joseph Smith and his life. She still views him as a prophet and considers him a friend. She so beautifully pays tribute to him and to Emma. I too can't wait to give Emma a hug in the life to come.<br />
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The final thing I loved about this book is the chapter in which she just lists out each reason/theory we've heard about why polygamy was practiced and then using historical facts and quotes knocks each one of them down. I loved this because each time someone guesses as to why it was instituted it leads to false doctrines and false ideas being spread. Some of them are so trivial too that I can't help but think "Do you really think God would sacrifice all of these women's happiness for that?"<br />
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After reading a few books on the subject I tend to believe that it was a misunderstanding of the sealing covenant. Joseph knows he needs to seal all the inhabitants of the earth together and he also believes that Christ's second coming is imminent. For some reason he lets men be sealed to one another as brothers or father and son but when it comes to women they are always married into the sealing covenant. Even here we have to take into account the culture and feelings toward women at the time and acknowledge that the idea of spiritual wives was gaining popularity among many starting out religious communities. I'm also sympathetic to the belief that it may have been issued by God in order to test the saints but only when paired with my definite belief that it could only have been temporal- not eternal. I also understand that many people will see it being completely driven by lust. Whatever the reason, I feel like Doctrine and Covenants 132 makes it pretty clear that if anything polygamy is the exception to God's rule of monogamy and only a temporal sacrifice...meaning not eternal in nature. When you think about all the revelation that the church has received since then about man and wife and their relationship as equals I don't see any way to mesh that with the idea of polygamy. The idea that God loves women and God wanting us to all practice polygamy just can't coexist in my brain.<br />
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Which is Pearson's real point. That the idea of eternal polygamy needs to be addressed so that we can put away the fears and misconceptions that are still silently prevalent in the minds and hearts of many faithful members. We often think of polygamy being a long ago doctrine that doesn't effect us anymore but it directly effects temple practices, family teachings and I believe it's also why we don't talk about our Heavenly Mother more (because of the false belief that there is more than one!). I, along with the author, hope that these things will be addressed. I believe further revelation and direction is needed in this matter and I appreciate Sister Pearson bringing attention to this topic.<br />
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/list/403325-julia">View all my reviews</a>
Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-1025837136001525162017-08-03T06:00:00.000-07:002017-08-06T20:53:26.343-07:00Book Review- In Sacred Loneliness: The Plural Wives of Joseph Smith <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/400736.In_Sacred_Loneliness" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="In Sacred Loneliness: The Plural Wives of Joseph Smith" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1359422834m/400736.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/400736.In_Sacred_Loneliness">In Sacred Loneliness: The Plural Wives of Joseph Smith</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4550956.Todd_M_Compton">Todd M. Compton</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2035696865">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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This was such a great read! I can't even imagine the amount of research that went into this. Each chapter is a detailed biography of each of Joseph Smith's plural wives (Todd Compton settles on 33 absolutely proven marriages while there are definitely others out there that are still being investigated). <br />
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Learning the stories of these women and getting to read things that they themselves wrote was amazing. We hear so little about women during the founding of the Mormon church and when we do it's often dramatized or makes them out to be never doubting, perfect, angel type women. While I believe they should be respected I think getting to know who they really were and what they really thought does much more to honor them than to only tell a sanitized version of their history.<br />
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Compton uses so many types of records to recreate each woman's life. Some of the wives are very well documented and known already such as Eliza R. Snow or Helen Mar Kimball, while others we have only one or two extant documents. There has been a lot of speculation about Smith's polygamy, who was involved, why it was practiced, etc. Compton uses journals (of men and women involved with polygamy at the time), as well as affidavits that many of the women wrote and signed later in life, writings and quotes attributed to Smith, receipts, newspaper articles, census records, and more in order to give us a more clear picture of these women's lives.<br />
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In addition to painting a more vivid picture of each of these women, this book also brought polygamy more into more focus for me. One realization was that Smith started practicing polygamy way before section 132 of the Doctrine and Covenants was written. Not only was it done in secrecy, but the secrecy was actually part of the covenant that Joseph made people take to participate in it. While I knew that it was a very hushed practice at the time I was amazed at the level of deception that many of the leaders participated in when talking to Emma about it and also in confronting accusations of polygamy in local newspapers and publications. Finally I was suprised at how important polygamy was to Joseph Smith and the early saints. It wasn't just a part of the gospel for them, it was the entire thing. They believed that polygamy was a pattern of what heaven will be like and Joseph believed that polygamy was his crowning revelation to the church and the most necessary component to assuring one's salvation.<br />
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Knowing these things, especially the last point, makes it much harder to simply put the question of polygamy on a shelf. Joseph Smith really believed that we'd be practicing polygamy in heaven, that the bigger the family kingdom you build on earth the higher your exaltation, and that it was necessary for salvation. All of which I don't believe. So this causes quite the dillemna for me in reconciling that with my belief in the church. While this book didn't really help me reconcile anything, I have found a couple others that break down the scriptures and revelations a little more and also, of course, I believe in the idea of updated revelations from our leaders now and in the future, and I don't think they are preaching that. I still find myself fascinated by the way Joseph viewed it though and learning more about the revelations themselves: where they came from, what Joseph thought they meant, what they actually could have meant, how Joseph tried to remain faithful to what he thought he should do, how he may have deviated from that course. Whether these beliefs about God were his only motive in implementing plural marriage we'll probably never know. But we can probably stop promoting false defenses of it such as stating that it increased the number of children born, or took care of widows, etc. We can see by birth statistics and the average age of Joseph's wives (and all polygamous wives in the early church) that these theories just aren't supported.<br />
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I enjoyed this book so much because it made the women come alive to me! I see such value in women learning about the stories of other women. It's something that can often get overlooked in a religious setting- the voice of the women. These ladies loved and were loved. They were mothers, daughters, sisters and friends. They had their heart broken, had hope, were midwives, felt lonely, lost husbands, lost children, got divorced, raised hell, etc. It let me look past the anecdotal stories that we hear and see a full dimensional person. Instead of just seeing their very best quote from an ensign article we get to see their real life quotes from their journals. Just what they were thinking and why. I loved it. I was amazed at how many women have a certain story in church history that we've heard and we only know just that one story and we never find out that she was also a wife of Joseph Smith and she also did all these other things outside of just the one little story. In fact, they have stories about divorce, raising children with disabilities, children who elope, being midwives for hundreds of births in primitive conditions, losing children who are poisoned by people who hate the church, not being sealed to the love of their life since they are already sealed to Joseph Smith, going through depression, participating in prayer meetings where they speak in tongues and give one another healers blessings, and much much more.<br />
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Also, the authors title was a pretty good description of how these women lived. Loneliness is a huge theme throughout the book and my heart broke for them and their sacrifices many times. Many of these women were told that not only their salvation but the salvation of their families relied upon them becoming plural wives to the prophet. One woman, Lucy Walker, even describes her feelings after she receives Joseph's proposal as saying that she felt her life was stretched across the sacrificial alter. My heart broke so many times for each of them. Those who were already married, those who were so young, those who were Emma's friends and yet keeping this secret. And of course my heart breaks for Emma and the things that she had to endure.<br />
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I was also surprised by how adamantly the women defended polygamy in public while hating it and rallying against it in private conversations or journal entries. I was also surprised by the fact, that in their zeal to defend polygamy they put down the institution of monogamy by calling it vile, wicked and carnal. Many of them talk about polygamy being God's only way of marriage and that monogamy was brought to the world from the evil Romans and that it took away the virtue of women and caused whoredoms and adultery. They also truly believed that monogamy would never be reinstated and so when it was within many of their lifetimes, that was a very very hard thing for them to go through.<br />
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I was also fascinated by the history of polygamy after Joseph's Smith's death. When Joseph III became president of the RLDS church he and others went on missions with the sole purpose of convincing others that Joseph Smith had never practiced polygamy. When information came to light that he had, the RLDS then took the perspective that none of the marriages were ever consummated. To counter their opinions Brigham Young made many of the plural wives of Joseph Smith sign affidavits that not only were they married but also that they were intimate. So we have their stories in their own words many times that spell out exactly the nature of their relationship. <br />
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Anyway, I could go on and on about this book but really people just need to read it. It will give you a better understanding of where Joseph Smith was coming from and also who these women were and the amazing things they did outside of marrying Joseph Smith. I think this part of our history is so important to study and learn from. These women have interesting and unique lives and go through so much more than I think I could bear in one lifetime. They are overlooked, persecuted, lonely, loyal, filled with faith, supportive friends to one another and amazing!
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<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/list/403325-julia">View all my reviews</a>
Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-1178426488382183112017-06-21T08:00:00.000-07:002017-08-05T13:45:41.949-07:00New Year's Goals Revisited and Some Thoughts on Setting BoundariesAs some may remember I posted earlier this year about my new year's goals being somewhat untraditional. After dealing with postpartum issues, depression and anxiety this year I decided I needed to make some goals that would help me increase my happiness and peace. The goals I proposed for myself were:<br />
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1) Care less what other people think about me<br />
2) Care less about what other people are doing<br />
3) Do less<br />
4) Focus on the first three and stop making so many goals!<br />
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If you'd like to see those goals in context or understand what I mean by them you can view the previous post here:<a href="http://www.neighborjulia.com/2017/01/perfect-new-years-goals-and-imperfect.html"> Perfect Goals and the Imperfect People That Make Them.</a><br />
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So what have I been doing to achieve these goals?<br />
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Goal #1- Standing up for myself more. Giving my opinions. Spending less time worrying about what others might be thinking. Praying to know the things that I should and shouldn't be doing. Working toward breaking my habit of saying "sorry" too much as a way to ease my guilt (or at least being cognizant of the fact that I'm doing that!). Trying to say sorry for those things that I'm genuinely sorry for and giving people time to forgive me or not. I've been working with a therapist to identify when and why I feel shame and how I can combat the negative feelings and actions that are produced by being caught up in that shame.<br />
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Goal # 2- I deleted the Facebook app from my phone. Yes I can still check it through the web browser on my phone, and yes sometimes I still do that but I'm trying to do it less. I limit my sessions on social media to twice a day and usually only spend about 10 min. per session. Taking time to have real conversations with people about what is going on in their life so that I keep a better perspective about what real life looks like.<br />
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Goal #3- Setting priorities each week about where I spend my time. I've started writing personal time on my calendars to make sure that breaks are built into my day. I'm also trying to set up consistent times to exercise and pursue other hobbies. I used to feel guilty if someone asked me to do something and I said no unless I had a for sure reason I couldn't do it. Now, if someone asks me to babysit and it's during the time I was going to do something (exercise, read, clean the kitchen) I don't feel as guilty saying no. Sometimes, if possible I change my schedule, but sometimes when it's the only time I have to get my personal items done then I just say "sorry, maybe next time". I'm definitely not perfect at this one but I'm working toward it!<br />
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As I've read a few books on these subjects and started into counseling to understand some of these issues better I've realized that these goals are all about boundaries. Each of these goals, in a way, is defining for myself what I am willing to put out there for others and what I'm willing to take from others. And as I look at the parts of my life that cause frustration and worry, I realize a lot of those feeling come from not setting appropriate boundaries (boundaries for myself, boundaries in my relationships, boundaries at church, even boundaries on my goal setting efforts).<br />
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So what does it mean to set a boundary? The most concise definition I could find was on wikipedia where it said: "<span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD">Personal boundaries are guidelines or limits that a person creates to identify reasonable, safe and permissible ways for other people to behave towards them and how they will respond when someone passes those limits." </span><br />
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<span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD">A video on the subject that I found helpful from lds.org can be found here: <a href="https://www.mormonchannel.org/listen/series/mormon-channel-daily-audio/tips-to-set-boundaries-in-any-relationship-july-14-2015">Tips to set boundaries in any relationship</a></span><br />
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<span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD">I think that boundaries not only apply to how others treat us, but can also extend to how we treat ourselves. I had reached a point in my life where I was no longer treating myself in a reasonable or safe way. I had negative thoughts about being worthless, I beat myself up for failures, I even questioned why I was even here. I needed to set some boundaries for myself. I also felt frustrated with others frequently. But as I begin to take responsibility for my own mental health and emotions I realize that my frustrations were not really anchored in the actions of other people, my frustration was with my own reaction. I didn't stand up for myself. I didn't state my opinions. I didn't make course corrections over small things and thus let little things turn into big things. I realized this when one friend got upset about something and another friend said "how can you be upset with Julia? that's like kicking a puppy?" I knew she was right and it kind of made me reflect on how I was reacting to things. I'm not a puppy. I'm a strong opinionated person! So why have I been letting myself get kicked and why am I acting like a puppy?</span><br />
<span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD"><br /></span><span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD">At my core I'm a loving person, some people I'm sure would disagree with that, but I feel like I am usually motivated out of charity and love for others. I am however, also a red personality, I like to get things done! It's sometimes hard to reconcile these two aspects of my personality. I don't want to step on others toes, I don't want to make a fuss, but at the same time I don't want to be held down or become stagnate. In recent years, I've focused so much on "not making a fuss" I've started doing a lot of unhealthy things- Not stating my opinion, letting others talk for me, not saying things in the right moment so then I vent it passive-aggressively later, letting things build on themselves until they explode. I've been trying so hard to repress the "bad" parts of my red personality I've been letting some of the "good" parts go too. I'd given up hobbies like debating, writing, and critical thinking. That last one is more of a life skill than hobby...but you still see my point!</span><br />
<span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD"><br /></span><span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD">So I'm working on setting those boundaries. And so far the results are mixed. Also, it's hard to be brave. It's hard to speak up for what you need after so many years of not doing that. It's hard to stand firm in what you believe when people are angry, or saddened, or confused by why you believe those things. Some of these types of conversations have gone really well. Others haven't. Some people have heard my boundaries and respected me for telling them while others have felt abandoned, called me selfish or insinuated that I'm not being very Christ-like. But I have to fall back on my first goal of worrying less about what others think of me. When I've made these boundaries out of love and after reflection and prayer then I have to be confident in taking care of myself. I've had people set boundaries with me and I find that as we are open about what we need in healthy relationships it makes the relationship stronger. I would much rather someone tell me when I'm crossing a line then sit back and stew and get frustrated with me. So I try and have faith that others will feel the same.</span><br />
<span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD"><br /></span><span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD">As a Christian it can be hard to find the balance between helping others and taking care of ourselves. Others might interpret our need for boundaries as a selfish. We know that we are supposed to be selfless and we know that we need to focus on others' needs as much as our own. But we also have to take care of ourselves to be able to have anything left to give to others. We've all heard the analogy of the oxygen in the airplane. First you put on your mask so you don't pass out, then you help your children put on theirs. Heavenly father expects us to take care of our bodies and our families and sometimes that means we have to disengage from other situations that take from our limited resources (emotional, time, financial) whatever the case may be. Going back to that original definition about boundaries: if someone is unwilling to be safe or reasonable around you, then it may be time to give it some distance and walk away temporarily until that person is ready to interact with you in a healthier way. We shouldn't judge what other people do but we can certainly be a wise judge in what we allow into our own lives and homes. Christ would not require us to be put in unsafe situations. He wouldn't want for us to be emotionally, verbally or physically neglected or abused. </span><br />
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<span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD">Christ was loving, kind and forgiving. But he still gave people instruction and commandments. He gave people the steps and practices that would improve our relationship with God. I'm certainly not saying we should command people in how they should treat us but it seems probable to me that Christ wouldn't have any problem with us giving people guidelines about steps and practices that can make our relationships healthier too. When the rich young man asks Christ what else he should do beyond believing on Christ, Christ tells him to sell all he has and follow him. When the young man refuses to sell all of his great possessions he goes away sorrowful and Christ sorrowfully lets him go. Christ doesn't say "okay never mind what I said before" or "I guess you don't really have to sell your possessions". He stands firm in the instruction that he gave. When we set a boundaries like- you need to listen to my feelings, or you can't be drunk around my kids, or you can't threaten me, or you can't yell profanities in my home, and the person refuses to do those things- then the Christlike thing to do is to step back. It can be hard to remember but when you take a step back you have to realize that you didn't harm the relationship by making a boundary they harmed the relationship by not being willing to consider the boundary important.</span><br />
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<span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD">I find that even though I've had more people temporarily upset with me in the last few months than I ever have before I also have more peace. I feel sorrow that some of my relationships will change and some may even stay broken because others might not be willing to accept my boundaries. But really, if someone can only be my friend if I'm the only one giving in the relationship, or because they don't know my real opinions about things, or I only tell them what they want to hear, or because I never stand up for myself...it probably wasn't a really quality relationship to begin with. </span><span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD"> </span><br />
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<span class="st" data-hveid="65" data-ved="0ahUKEwjXxe-jvM_UAhVl9YMKHSrdBGsQ4EUIQTAD">I'm learning who I am and what I believe. I know that I love and care about others. I know that those who love and care about me will stay by me and support me as I make positive changes in my life and as I state my opinions. I'm learning sometimes being kind and loving requires me to do hard or difficult things. I'm learning that being a "red" personality isn't a bad thing like some would have you believe. Each personality type has strengths and weaknesses. As I embrace my personality and focus on it's positives I know I can get stuff done! Like improving my relationships, improving my view of self, and improving my mental wellness and quality of life!</span><br />
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5743222505407122042.post-55947224352802714012017-06-20T06:00:00.000-07:002017-08-06T20:50:13.170-07:00Book Review- Joseph Smith: Rough Stone Rolling<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/236609.Joseph_Smith" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Joseph Smith: Rough Stone Rolling" border="0" src="https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1388188757m/236609.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/236609.Joseph_Smith">Joseph Smith: Rough Stone Rolling</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/138368.Richard_L_Bushman">Richard L. Bushman</a><br />
My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2035628325">5 of 5 stars</a><br />
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Longest good reads review ever coming up...<br />
A very good and honest look at the life of Joseph Smith. The author refers to it as a cultural biography in that it gives a clearer picture to Joseph Smith's actions, teachings, etc. by highlighting the culture of Americans in the early 1800s. <br />
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I had marked it as a book that I wanted to read based on the lds topics articles that can be found on LDS.org that discuss some of the churches more controversial teachings (some that were lived historically and some that are lived today) such as polygamy, Heavenly Mother, seer stones, priesthood restrictions, etc. No matter the topic, this book would come up as a reference and so when I was at BYU in early May I went ahead and picked up a copy at the campus bookstore.<br />
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I honestly would recommend this to anyone (member or not) who is interested in knowing about the roots of Mormonism. I feel like the author did a pretty good job of presenting the material in a neutral way. In fact, he even dedicates most of the preface to the book explaining why and how he tries to present it in a historically factual yet neutral way. And I felt like it made the book easier to read coming from that perspective. I thought this book would answer a lot of questions for me. And it did. However, it also left me with a whole new (and possibly bigger) crop of questions to be answered in the future. It was definitely not a light read and left my poor husband as the recipient of most of my late night questions and discussions. <br />
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I find it funny that sometimes other members of the church will view historical books about the church as anti-mormon literature. Despite having purchased this book at the BYU bookstore I was told by someone that I shouldn't be reading it. I understand that not everyone wants or needs to know about the early church. For me, I feel like if I can only accept the easy parts, and never look at some of the dark or hard to understand parts of church history, can I really claim to have a strong testimony? <br />
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After finishing this book I would say that my testimony has definitely been affected. I wouldn't really say that it's been strengthened or lessened, but it has me seeing things a lot differently than I did before. I think we get a very limited number of stories from church history that make up the bulk of what we've been taught in Sunday school and we start to think that everything was the way that those few stories portray it to be. Taking a step back and looking at the entire life of Joseph Smith and the other founding members of the early church helps to make the picture a little less picturesque and little more diverse. These were real people, with real struggles, making good and bad decisions, making mistakes, helping others, fighting, forgiving, etc. That might be hard for some to accept, but for me it makes it more believable and relatable. If God loved these imperfect people maybe he loves me.<br />
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So, here are some of the topics this book covers:<br />
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Seer Stones/Translation-<br />
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I've made my peace long ago with seer stones and the Book of Mormon translation process. Being a bit of mystic myself and knowing what I do about the religious culture of the time I really don't have a problem with Joseph Smith looking for treasure, helping people find lost items, or translating plates by looking into a stone. Do I think that is how God usually talks to people...no. But maybe sometimes he lets people use tools that are comfortable for them. I guess if I believe that Moses talked to Him in a burning bush, I can believe Joseph Smith saw the word of God in a stone. The part that is hard for me to understand is why more members don't know more about this part of Joseph's history or how the Book of Mormon was translated. However, I'm excited that the church's website is starting to address these issues and the church just announced a new extensive church history that will be published in several volumes over the next few years and no doubt added to the Sunday school resources. <br />
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First Vision (and the differences in written accounts)-<br />
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I'm still good with the first vision. I'm even fine with each of the accounts being different. I don't really feel like any of them contradict one another. Some are more elaborate than others, some focus more on particular aspect, but for the most part tell the same story (even though they may be used to emphasize different points). I know from some of my behavioral science classes when I was becoming a teacher that when a kid tells the same story over and over the same exact way it often means it's an altered story (either covering up details, fabricated by them, or memorized from an adult). Had Joseph Smith told the story word for word the same way each time throughout his life I'd probably be more inclined to think it was made up. But maybe that's just me. An interesting thing to note about that time in American history is that there were tons of people claiming to see Christ and Heavenly Father. And his account really isn’t that uncommon when compared with stories being told by others at the time. I guess for some that would make them inclined to think he was telling the truth, and for others probably that they were all lying. I enjoyed reading more thorough accounts of others who also had first vision stories.<br />
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Prophecy<br />
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Now this was one of the topics that I feel like I was not very well-read about. I think sometimes the way we think about prophecy is very old testament in nature…God just comes down and states in plain words exactly what his people should do. While Joseph sometimes claims to receive his prophecy this way it’s often received more as impressions and in very vague terms. I was also interested in the many accounts of him being “caught up in the spirit” where he would collapse or shake or have to be carried around from place to place while semi-conscious. Again, historically this is something that a lot of denominations at the time were doing but we always hear so much about him trying to distance the early saints from the Shakers and others that it was interesting how many of those practices he participated in himself. <br />
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Also, because so many of his prophecies were indirect or vague. We have to look at his interpretations of prophecy. Sometimes he would publish them directly or give them in front of large groups. Other times he would write them down and then draft and redraft them until he felt like he had it right. A pattern that seems to emerge for me is that Joseph Smith had a tendency to take things overly literal. Or another way of saying that would be that he sometimes took eternal principals and tried to make them fit into the physical mortal world at the time. He hears treasure in Salem and he’s thinking it’s gold when it’s really converts. He hears Kingdom of God and he sets up a secret council of fifty and appoints himself king. He hears that we need to seal the human race together in the Kingdom of God and he starts marrying multiple women and sealing men to one another as father and son for dynastic reasons. He hears Zion and he immediately thinks it’s a specific place- Missouri, Kirtland, eventually Utah. He hears second coming and he thinks it’s happening next week. This isn’t to say he didn’t receive these revelations just that sometimes his interpretation about how it should be handled or how literal it is seems off. I know I sound like I’m trying to rationalize some of the more difficult decisions he made. This is just my own opinion on things. I think the church clarifies some of these and some have just kind of been dropped. We now believe that zion has many stakes all over the world. That the kingdom of God is an eternal organization rather than a physical government. But when it comes to polygamy, it’s just kind of this gray blob out there that no one really knows about. Was it commanded of God? Why? If so, was it lived in the correct way? Etc etc etc. But we’ll get there later on in my polygamy sections.<br />
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Word of Wisdom<br />
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So some interesting history here about when it was actually enforced. When received Joseph regarded it as a “good thing to try” but not a commandment as serious as say polygamy. I found it interesting that Joseph continued to drink and occasionally smoke the rest of his life. And that sacraments and temple ordinances were all performed with alcohol for many years even after his death. He even gets drunk on occasion and has a fist fight with one of his brothers. I think sometimes we hear the story about him being a young man and needing surgery on his leg and he refuses to drink and says that he’ll be fine if his dad just holds him and we think that indicates he never drank. I don’t fault that church or teachers or anyone for that, it’s just my own incorrect assumption that I made when I was younger.<br />
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Mob violence:<br />
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There’s no question that Joseph Smith and the early saints had some terrible, violent and unjust acts perpetrated against them. Including theft, tar and feathering, rape, murder, and more. In some cases these things were even made lawful to do to Mormons. However, I always assumed that these acts were all perpetrated by people who didn’t know much about the Mormons or hated them for being different. When in fact many of these stories were carried out by disaffected ex-mormons or even splintering groups within the church itself. For instance the Kirtland temple is taken over by several recently excommunicated members of the quorum of the twelve. It was also unfortunate to read about many instances where church members where found stealing, destroying, burning printing presses etc. of non Mormons either in retaliation or under orders from superiors within the church. Very sad treatment of many people on both sides who did not deserve it.<br />
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Polygamy<br />
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This one is hard guys. This one is seriously hard for me. I just have a really hard time reconciling polygamy and my belief that God values women equally with men. I just don’t see how they can go together. And I guess I always just put this on the shelf before and said “I’m never going to understand that one so I’m just not going to think about it”. But after reading this book and realizing how important Joseph Smith regarded this practice it’s hard to put it on the shelf and consider myself a well informed saint. Joseph Smith has several quotes referring to polygamy as his crowning doctrine. The doctrine that all other doctrines pointed toward. It's often suggested that it was just a test of the obedience but that's not what Joseph Smith taught. He believed it was a necessary ordinance of exaltation...just like baptism or marriage. So, I guess I have to take a closer look at it. <br />
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Upon closer inspection, however, you find some hard stories. Already married women who are sealed to Joseph Smith instead of their husbands. Sexual relations with younger women, older women and the already married women. Joseph actively telling people to keep it secret from Emma (his first wife) and telling women when it’s safe to come over to avoid Emma. Emma threatening to leave him. In fact, as he begins to extend the practice of polygamy to other men he tells those men that part of the doctrine of polygamy is that they must keep it secret from their first wives also. How could a loving God require that of women or men? It’s a lot to take in. <br />
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It's also interesting to note that so many men left the religion because they refused to live polygamy. Oliver Cowdery, Orson Hyde, and more. Eventually some come back and do live polygamy but many others don't. It's often suggested that these men left because they wanted more power within the church or wanted to be prophet. That may have been true too but we have to acknoweledge that on some level a lot of these men leave over polygamy. <br />
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I mentioned before that it is kind of ambiguous why the church stopped that practice. Certainly a partial reason is to gain statehood. Many of the early saints and prophets of the restoration have multiple quotes about polygamy being superior to monogamy and that polygamy will never be taken from the earth again. Yet it is. So if they were wrong about it never being stopped, is it possible they were wrong about starting it up in the first place? Or is it a case like when they started to practice the law of consecration and they failed at it so God stepped it back a bit. And if they were practicing polygamy wrong, in what ways was it wrong? Should it not have just been men with multiple spouses? Maybe it was more of an eternal principal and they didn’t need to have marriages in the mortal or sexual sense? Maybe it was supposed to be a financial or protective joining rather than a physical one? Again, these are the questions I have. I’m not trying to give anyone any answers.<br />
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And lastly, the reason that this topic is so hard for me to put on a shelf- the fact that it is still in some form practiced today. As Mormons, we claim all the time that the practice was ended a hundred years ago. And while that’s physically true we still practice spiritual polygamy all the time through temple sealings. If a man divorces or becomes a widower he can be sealed to a new spouse at the same time while a woman may only be sealed to one man. I know that several years ago, it was changed so that a deceased woman can now be sealed to more than one man, but that is much less common than the other. So it’s not really that we aren’t practicing polygamy we’ve just postponed it for the next life. <br />
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There's approximately 1 million more things I could say about this topic but since the book I'm currently reading is a biography of women who lived polygamy I'll save the rest for that book review.<br />
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Women and the Gospel<br />
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This is the last topic I’ll hit, even though there are more that I’d love to discuss. It’s hard to be a religious woman because we are told over and over again that we should find ourselves in the scriptures and learn about our divine potential from our heavenly parents. But all of the writers of scripture are men and 98% of the stories are about men. And we know tons about our Heavenly Father but very little of our Heavenly Mother. I feel like church leaders today are good and they are careful to add women into the scriptures. When a scripture says the word man you might often hear them add “and women” when reading it aloud. But given the cultural background and attitudes toward women at the time when the doctrine and covenants or bible was written it’s not very likely that the original authors thought it included women. It’s kind of like when the Founding fathers wrote “All men are created equal” they didn’t mean women or other races, they meant all white men are created equal. When Joseph Smith hears “This is my work and my Glory- to bring to pass the immortality and Eternal life of man” he is thinking of it in the same way- Man, not woman.<br />
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One clear place we can see this is in temple practices that are different for men and for women based on Eve’s choice. So even though one of the articles of Faith written by Joseph Smith says Men won’t be punished for Adam’s transgression the follow up to that is that Women will be punished for Eve’s. This shows me that when Joseph Smith wrote man in this context, he meant just that, man.<br />
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The church organization from the beginning has men at the lead with women at home taking care of the family and property. I’m not saying I want the priesthood or anything. I just mean that reading this helped me empathize with early latter-day saint women. For months at a time the men are in the school of the prophets or in the temple learning and being edified while the women are left at home doing all their own chores, and their husbands chores, and taking care of the children (many of whom die in their arms.) While things aren’t quite as bleak for me today. It’s still very hard in church culture when my husband is called into so many meetings and receives so much training and I’m often left at home taking care of all the other things. Or I’m left at church taking care of all the kids and can’t hear any of the spiritual messages. It’s hard to feel like my bucket is getting filled at all. <br />
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I also was under the impression that men and women received the endowment at the same time. When in fact it was actually a few years in between the first endowment of the male leadership and the endowments given to women. Part of this has to do with the fact that the first endowment didn’t resemble our current endowment in any way. When it was revisited a few years later, and given more structure, it was then made available to women for the purpose of them being able to enter into polygamy. It was also interesting to note that there was an ordinance called a “second anointing” that was given after the endowment to people as a gift for helping Joseph marry additional wives or for entering into polygamy themselves. When I tried to look this up on LDS.org the only reference was in a Sunday school lesson that said “Do not try to discuss or answer any questions about the second anointing”- which kind of gave me a sinking feeling.<br />
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So, I’m not apostate. I’m just making sense of things. I guess a huge takeaway for me is that God uses imperfect people. And that maybe he doesn’t reveal all of his purposes even to his most elect because we are all here to make decisions and be tried. Even with all the questions I have I’m able to see Joseph Smith as a prophet. But not infallible. I know that we all make mistakes and that he made mistakes. But, sometimes it would be nice to know which things were mistakes and which weren’t. For each person that line is going to be different...obviously some people think it was all a mistake or lie, others think none of it was a mistake and it was all done perfectly, for me the truth seems to be somewhere in the middle. Like I said before- sometimes the church clarifies and sometimes they don’t. Are the holding things back? Are we just not ready? Are some things just unknowable? Anyway, all of you people who are smarter than I am, read this book and give me some answers! Please! ;)
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Juliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01038620914974981518noreply@blogger.com0